The Saturday session #57

Happy weekend all.

#57 opens the doors to the festive season; no panic here as its just another day with the family and one that always has its high points. This weekend i’m taking my five year old shopping and allowing him full responsibility for present buying. This will be a huge success and will be a practical demonstration of kindness/thoughtfulness or he will buy toys he wants and I’m not sure Nanny and Grandad will appreciate the Marvel figures…shall update you next week to how it goes. (pray for me)

I’m not sure anymore why I run this linky with the lovely Hayley (accept she’s a joy to work with – check out her featured blogger by clicking here), in the beginning it was a challenge but now its become a habit…then I read a blog like Isabel’s from Sustainable responsible living and my heart explodes with joy. I double dare you infinity to read her blog without learning something new. I LOVE LEARNING. Thus, she is my featured blogger this week – her tale of Avocado on toast is not like one you’ve ever read before. The origins of posh millennial food like limes and Avocado is analysed and with Isabel’s view of the world we are reeducated that this over price fruit…veg…green stuff, is in fact not as joyful as one would like to think. If you do nothing this weekend click here to read her wisdom on the mighty avocado (and I also agree with her, recently they are so mass produced they are tasteless). I love blogs like hers that open my mind to a more joyful way of living.

Thank you to everyone that is joining us this week, read the rules, click the blue box and lets kick off week fifty seven with a #thesatsesh smile. Enjoy.

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays@mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

 

No.

To quote Hamlet, act 3, scene 3, line 87

We are on the cusp of a consumer crazy season. Of crackers with plastic and wrappings that nobody wants, that are often abandoned on the table long after the plates have been clearer away. Perhaps of saying thank you for gifts that lack thoughts, need or joy.

I know this post isn’t my usual sparkly positive self. Don’t despair, I’m about to flip it around but before I do I want to empower you with the word No. (As a Teacher and a Mum I feel Hamlet needs to add the words ‘thank you’ after his quote). Balance in life is crucial for physical and mental wellbeing. I’ve written many posts about ‘yes’ – to opportunities, change and adventure that so many of us hide from in daily life. I’m a fan honestly.

However, December seems to bring excess and anxiety for things we don’t want to do.

If you feel at all doubtful, listen to your instinct and say No.

  • Say No to buying gifts for that awkward Aunt or Uncle that you feel obliged to because they buy for you. It only takes a quick awkward phone call to release everyone of this burden for many Christmas’s to come
  • You don’t need to eat everything you’re offered
  • you can say no to sprouts.
  • You don’t need to attend that party that makes you feel anxious.
  • You don’t have to wear anything you don’t want to. I am the proud owner of zero Christmas jumpers.
  • Christmas doesn’t mean ‘spend money you don’t have’ say No.

Make sure the traditions you and your family participate in bring joy, love and a sense of fun…not awkward social events. Don’t become one of the three kings that bought guilt, anxiety and fear. Many of the innkeepers said No and it led to a way cooler version of Christmas. Baby Jesus born in a stable gathered by animals is all the better for its simplicity.

Saying No doesn’t need to be negative, it’s in fact a tool that can bring a huge amount of joy and relief. Balance is where joy and happiness can be fully embraced. This holiday season say yes to things that make you warm and smile, politely decline things your instinct tells you will add stress, keep the holiday season simple and stay present in all you do. It’s a recipe for the perfect Christmas.

Wake. Pray. Slay

Quote by awesome Anon

I find that if I can wake on my terms (without a little ninja creeping in and tackling me) I can literally take on the world.

Seriously it’s like a revolutionary universal explosion, when the ninja does creep in my day is more like the Jurassic age…mummy dinosaur is ferocious. I’ve wrote a post before about my morning routine but thought I’d write about how I turn my Mummy-Rex in to a mummy dream when things don’t go as planned.

I lock myself in the toilet. We are blessed with both an upstairs and downstairs bathroom, so if one is out of action nobody has the excuse to break down the door. I basically sit and reawaken. It’s not as snug as my bed, but it’s ninja attack free. I then do some simple breathing techniques that I find work for me. I’ve also been known to do these in public bathrooms when my stress levels are going crazy. It’s called the OM breath and just two minutes is enough to reduce your heart rate by two thirds. I also like it because as you breath in and out you make a rasping sound that reminds me of waves. Google it, it works and the tutorials are hilarious.

I write a list. Seriously, I’m a spiritual being but have never found joy in prayer, but a list is like fuel in my engine. It gives me direction in an otherwise chaotic day, I feel a huge sense of achievement as I tick off each item. I’ve even been known to add things I’ve done previously to writing the list, on the list, just so I can tick them off. I even have a notebook dedicated to lists.

Self care indulgence. Everyday I squeeze in a little self care, it might be painting my nails, lighting candles, clearing out a draw, ringing a friend…but on days when I’ve turned it around I reward myself with bonus time. Today was indeed a slay day. There was so much to do and I was a single parent with the Mr away, so once the ninja was asleep I had a bubble bath, hair treatment, painted my nails, lit candles, listened to a podcast, had some posh tea and even made time (thanks to the tribe of support) to squeeze in a yoga class.

…why? Because when you’ve slayed you need to do two things.

  • Celebrate: because whatever you were slaying was exhausting.
  • Top up your cup: there’s that wise old saying that you can’t pour from an empty cup and frankly my cup was cracking today, nobody wants me to leak over them so best I fill in the chip and recharge.

I hope you wake to slay tomorrow. How do you turn things around when your day isn’t going as planned? Please share any tips in the comment section 🙂

Worry means you suffer twice

Quote by Newt Scamander.

  • Warning, I’m doing that thing again where the need to write pulls me out of my bed (even with freshly laundered sheets) and on to the floor in the office at the back of the house with the glow of my Macbook for company and a beauty salt lamp by my side. (desks have always felt a little too formal for me and I’m grounded on the floor; even if its a little draughty), so please forgive me if what I write is waffle.

I often write on the topic of happiness, perspective or self care. There is usually a silver lining or positive perspective to sparkle up this corner of the internet and worry isn’t my friend. I don’t invite him/her to my celebrations, neither does she/he make my Christmas card list (frankly, since having a child and working full time anyone who receives a card from me is truly blessed). I avoid negative people, conversations and situations. We don’t watch TV in our home, the news (web or paper version) are non existent. Yet still I am totally aware that the world we are part of is out of control. That plastic consumption is ridiculous and that banning plastic straws has probably come a little late in the day. That power, money and fear are still the driving forces. That scare mongering, praying on the vulnerable, greed and selfishness are growing much like plastic straws on our oceans seabeds, that stress is increasing, that happiness is often ‘sold’ in a misguided manner… I know this. It shakes my bubble that I work hard to create hard every now and then, its sucks the sparkle and actually at times has taken my breath with it.

Worry is the new fear (I’m not sure how new is new). We worry about worrying in between moments of ‘what if’s’ and ‘could’ ‘should’s’… the list is long. In education bullying is old hat, self diagnosis of anxiety and depression are on the increase amongst our children, as a species we are lost and drown our sorrows with drugs and alcohol (usually through those blooming plastic straws) and what I guess woke me from my comfy bed is a request, to ask you too to build a bubble, a cocoon of kindness and self care, to not engage with the negativity described above. Contrast is necessary for us to thrive, I can’t promise you can fully cut it out. Think of my request as a new detox regime – no fancy products needed, no 90 day money back guarantee required, in fact it won’t cost a penny. I’m asking because worry can be such a positive tool – it lets you know when you’ve lost balance, it reminds you that you care…but never give it the power to allow you to suffer twice.

If you can’t do this, then please at least stop using plastic straws.

Lost in a world that doesn’t exist.

Quote Anon (possibly song lyrics)

We are all absorbed in a world that often isn’t what it seems, always learning new things and what I’m going to share blew my brain. Its an experiment conducted by Dr. Masaru Emoto, where cooked rice was put in three beakers. Dr Masaru then speaks to the beakers daily (or shouts), you can also label them. The results blew my brain and I invite you to try it yourself.

What do you need?

  • 3 jars
  • 3 teaspoons of cooked rice
  • a best friend (optional)
  • a permeant marker to label the jars, or a sticky label and pen.

My bestie and I were talking about the experiment and I have to say, I was intrigued. I seized the day and grabbed three jars. I labelled my three jars gratitude, disgusting and ignore.

I placed a teaspoon of cooked rice in each jar, let in cool and then sealed it. I then spent the next few weeks daily telling each jar how thankful I was for it, how revolting it was…or I ignored it. Over the next few days and weeks I then sent the following photos to my bestie and we exchanged thoughts on the experiment. A good google will give you lots of scientific analysis and tell you more information on the experiment, below are my results after thirty days.

When I opened the jars (outside in the garden) the gratitude jar has no sign of fermenting, it smelt sweet but not necessarily pleasant, I really couldn’t believe how clear it was. The disgusting jar was very different – the smell packed a punched and the rotting is clear to see. I could see at least five different types of mould. The ignore jar looked clear too (which surprised me) the water in the jar was a little cloudy, however when I opened the jar the smell was unbearable and I’ve changed many nappies at close range.

I realise that this isn’t  very ‘scientific’ and that there are many variables; from the position of the jars, how many grains were in each jar, what was in the jar previously…the list goes on, but my world was altered for the better from doing this experiment and perhaps thats all that is necessary. Below are my thoughts and what I’ve taken from this…

1). If humans are approximately 60% water and water has a conscience- then how we speak to ourselves and how we let others speak to us has much more of mental and physical effect than I ever perceived. Since doing the experiment I am much more aware of my inner voice and the thoughts I choose to think, I also avoid being around others that could poison my jar. If the conversation turns negative, I make my apologies and leave.

2). Now I understand why my Nanny talks to her plants. If rice in a jar can be THAT effected by negative words, objects I once thought were just that – objects, are much more sensitive to their surroundings. *at this point my brain slightly blows with incomprehensible truths about the world we live in. If the sea, plant life and animal kingdom are all receptive to the energy projected at them then the first place to start being kind is to ourselves and then to spread the kindness and gratitude like…water.

3). My son was part of this experiment but I will do it with him again when he is slightly older, I hope it will teach him about his inner powers.

This last image is powerful but again, don’t take my word for it. Grab yourself a jar or two and let me know how the conscious rice experiment works for you.

The Saturday session #50

Nifty fifty…i’m so excited, we need to celebrate. fifty weeks (give or take a cheeky holiday) of me being consistent in my blogging approach. My Mr describes our relationship as a balloon, in essence I’m the balloon – a spontaneous, hot air, rising high without little thought to consequences, whilst he is my string. Solid; holds me still and stops be floating away. So for me to be consistent for fifty weeks is a huge deal. I’m in total gratitude to my cohost – my string on #thesatsesh the mindful hands full Hayley (you can check out her featured blogger here too) I’d also like to thank all of our regular bloggers who join us week after week, our newbie #thesatsesh peeps and of course you for reading.

For week fifty I felt like not only did I need a ‘fridgesays’ vibe post as my featured blogger, I also needed a blogger I admire. Mrs rose tinted life is so my kind of lady, I know one day we will sit down and have a glass (or several together), her post on cough cures made me chuckle and also resonated with me. As a family we try to reduce chemicals where we can, reuse, recycle and make a little less global destruction on this planet, we also don’t really take medication. I say ‘really’ as I have delivered my children via C-section, but we avoid prescription medication where we can. We use most of the cough cures that her elderly neighbour mentioned and I strongly believe that most cures are found in nature. Well done to the lovely Berni, she is a wonderful human and joyful artist, blogger, BnB host…and so much more.

Jump in to week fifty and read the rules below if you can’t remember the small details. Once again, thank you for joining us and happy week 50!

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays@mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on one of each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Everything is figureoutable

Quote Anon.

I know these aren’t real words, but so much of my vocabulary that I use is created in my head, this spoke to me.

When I was younger I really felt that once you became an adult you had the world worked out, the pathways would open like some sort of ‘open sesame’ then on you plodded. Well either I wasn’t listening when they were handing out maps (highly likely) or the routes of life are more unknown than I had thought.

Problems, often cascade from no where. They arrive on my doorstep in envelopes of large bills that I wasn’t expecting, a car can collide into my rear and phone calls and more letters are required. The health of loved ones can be shared in a text or conversation and then hospital visits and worry ensues… or you can breath.

I know, breathing doesn’t actually pay the bill or fix a car, but it does allow your brain to process the issue from a grounded place rather than in a state of emotional turmoil.

Often when I’m faced with an issue that I can’t figure out how to solve, changing the activity I’m doing or distracting my brain with something I enjoy often means I come to a conclusion far quicker.

It sounds crazy, I realise to say ‘don’t think about the problem you can’t stop thinking about’ but honesty it works. My dear friend couldn’t conceive, her partner and her stopped trying whilst they saved for IVF…with the pressure removed she conceived and gave birth to a health bundle of new born.

When you ‘let go’ of tension magic happens; money flows from places you didn’t know existed, friends help out in ways you didn’t know they could…issues that you just couldn’t work out become figureoutable.

It’s not exactly a map to adulthood, but it is a magical step on a smoother pathway. Enjoy the journey and remember all problems are generally solved eventually, if you lack confidence then give this a read because You can, end of story

Beauty is an attitude

Quote by Estée Lauder

Boom! This quote is everything. For those of you born with a disadvantaged face, that thinks they need to be something that they aren’t, that believes beauty is physical – it’s a good day. You need two things to be beautiful and neither are related to HOW you look.

I hate to double quote but Roald Dahl gives us an insight into beauty with gem from the classic children’s book The Twits:

“A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

You see kind thoughts create our reality and as I’ve discussed in so many of my posts, when you come from a place of good basic maths tells us that good things can be the only outcome, so rule one is think good thoughts and don’t forget this means thinking kindly internally about yourself and your capabilities.

So now the thoughts are flowing in a state of positivity, it’s time to put the coat of attitude on. Many jump for the obvious option – arrogance, but that often becomes ugly quickly and comes from your ego. That said, it can be breathtakingly beautiful (its usually the images you see on the front of magazines). I would encourage you to select my personal favourite; the transparent sparkly rain Mack. Basically how this item works is you are you – it’s transparent so everyone can see you. The sparkles are the bits you want to show off, extend those eyelashes with your favourite mascara, wear a top that makes you feel fabulous, style your hair in a way that makes you magical; that’s your sparkle. Then own that Mack, write your name in it. Invest in it and of course look after it. Hold your head high and I promise you will feel beautiful. This in turn will magnetise you to lovely people, wonderful experiences and genuine compliments. Beauty is an attitude, not a physical state.

img_0233

The Saturday session #48

Week forty eight is here, as someone that often lacks commitment I am going to celebrate week fifty with a bottle of champagne…perhaps I shouldn’t plan two weeks prior, but you know me – I adore an upbeat celebration. So before I tell you who my featured blogger is I’d like to pay total respect to Hayley my cohost (you can see who she has picked as her featured blogger here) who was once a blog I’d enjoyed reading and is now a wonderful real life friend…thanks twinkle.

Now I’ve set the mood, I will seamlessly tell you who my Daddy inspired featured blogger is this week, he’s post moved me to tears and made me really think about the future. ‘But I like my balls the way they are’ from Three Times Daddy honestly dealt with a taboo subject in a practical and honest matter. Having never had testicles myself I’m not sure how I’d feel about a drastic cut BUT I appreciate that mankind is attached to them, I can’t wait for the sequel, may be it will even become a trilogy with a third ‘ life after the boys have left town’. I also really like the layout and structure of the site. Its practical, minimalist and sleek…hmm perhaps the fridge needs a remodel?

Join us for week 48, have a read of the rules below and click that blue box.

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays@mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on one of each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Start your day with a dance party

Quote Anon wearing sparkly shoes

I have a morning routine that I do before my day begins, you can read about it here. If you do nothing for yourself ever again, I suggest you get one too. It makes my day start from a place of joy and if I didn’t have it in my life it would be like not having lungs.

After this the days demands capture me, throw me into a frenzy and at times I have to regain control with a mini mindful exercise. I think the ‘your day’ in this quote is really important, we can blame others when they interrupt our flow, make excuses but really it’s how we deal with life’s negatives and how long we hold on to them that guides our lives.

Emotions are complex, the extremes are often lifted for me with a dance to a song that makes me smile. I crank it up and dance like I’m on stage in a huge concert hall. The boys run for cover – this mummy can’t sing BUT THAT DOESN’T STOP ME. I find night club classics from my clubbing days are a great way to begin, then I move on to anthems. The concert in my bedroom, lounge or kitchen goes on until I’m ready to take on the world…which reminds me The Guardians of the Galaxy sounds tracks are also amazing for mood shifting.

Sometimes I listen through headphones for a personal party effect but mainly I like to contaminate the house with my moves and boom the music as loud as it can go. I’ve also been known to find a musical soundtrack on Spotify and work my way through the numbers…always with random lines from various characters delivered in perfect time. My son sometimes comes in for a strut, but mainly I’m a solo act.

Why? Well I do have a drama degree, but I actually think I dance because physically moving helps those endorphins to buzz around, lifts the soul, its free and guess what – it works.

If you have never danced in the mirror, thrown yourself down the stairs like a Hollywood diva in the last few weeks then I have one piece of advice. Do it. Dancing isn’t for those that can, Shakira was right – the hips don’t lie. Kelis finds milk shades and boys in her yard, Beyoncé runs the world and Tina Turner is simply the best and looking great on each and every roll down the river. So what are you waiting for? Solo dance through the week and watch the changes that happen to your mood, body and vibration.