The Saturday Session #37

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

I had a little treat today, one of my old pupils came to see me, she’s 22 years old now but forever 16 in my mind. She entered pushing a push chair and with another on the way. Luckily she was always crazy, so she’ll excel with two under two years old. It was such a blessing to hear about her career and how her and her partner have recently got a mortgage and settled. It was lovely to see her ‘Mummying’ like a legend. She always made me proud.

This leads me beautifully on to my featured blogger, the theme of her post is gratitude and reflection as she looks back at what the month of May held for her and her family. Helena from The Queen of collage monthly round up was a lovely way to look back at what her family had got up to. The longer I blog the more I find myself writing about my tribe, not necessarily for the readers but as a way to keep our family memories alive. Helena is obviously a devoted Mumma, but also a creative chick with a flare for detail. If you don’t follow her, haven’t read her posts or are looking to blend creativity with parenting – this writer is for you. Please use the link above to check her out. She deserves the love.

Enjoy week thirty seven of #thesatsesh and thanks for joining us, time goes so fast when you are reading so many lovely blogs – click here to see who Hayley my cohost has picked as her featured blogger and if you are joining us please make time to comment and use the hashtag #thesatsesh – if in doubt, read the rules below…

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

My brain has too many tabs open

~ Fridgesays ~ 32 Comments

Quote Anon, but I think most humans at various parts of their lives have probably thought something similar.

The original computers were based on human brains, designed by human brains and so its no surprises that our lives often become endless array of tabs open, just like a busy computer. My current mind is whirling since I just put my son to sleep (I say down he is currently chatting to himself and showing no sign of slumber) I’ve got parent tab bars open, work deadlines and things I need to do for tomorrow, the new shoes that I’m watching, childcare arrangements I need to make for the week ahead, goals for the future, chores to do – these fall into several tabs alone – some I need to do, desire to do and if time slows down some I might actually achieve. Its no surprise that the modern worlds demand and if I’m honest the demands that I put upon myself (see chore tab bars) often seem relentless and never ending.

So we have several choices…

1). Die a miserable death of disappointment and torment (seriously, its no coincidence that the word disease is literally ‘dis-ease within the body’)

2). Keep a balance on the tab’s of life – reduce where needed, or perhaps even take a holiday to escape the everyday demand of tab bars. Warning: body pressures on holiday, safety when abroad, travelling with kids, financing the holiday and the washing when you return can lead to more tab’s being open.

3). Stop and reduce the tab’s.

I personally favour the third option and do this through meditation. Something I need to make more time for daily. *blog about how I’m going to achieve that coming soon.

However, what I’d like to share with you today is a mini journey I’m taking with my son. J is five, he attends school and is in Reception, hates the academic aspects of school life and loves the sandpit. We are currently working to improve his handwriting, confidence with his fine motor skills and making sure we all don’t loose the will to live in the process. Its hard.

Then a couple of weeks a go I watched a programme where children with ADHD were encouraged to meditate and it even enabled the parents that invested the time on meditating to stop using medication. As I was watching it I thought, why aren’t I doing this with my son? He knows that both of his parents meditate, he even sometimes watches, I teach kids at school but I’ve never taught him?

We are hoping that its a tool that he can use, just like riding his bike or swimming and reading. The bonus is if it helps him at school or when he finds too many tab bars open in his mind. If you’ve ever spent more than five minutes with a five year old boy then you’ll know that tabs pop up frequently; questions, answers, facts on dinosaurs, what we are doing tomorrow, what we are having for lunch? when its snack time? where is Daddy? …anything involving toilet humour, star wars, phonics…the tabs are endless and currently lack any filter.

We began small with a 2 minute meditation, I did some research using real tab bars and found out that children respond best with guided meditations that you use repetitively (there is comfort in ‘knowing what comes next’ for little dudes) and also not spoken by someone that they know AKA Mummy.

I found a quiet space, invited him to join me, role modelled the process and with my eyes slightly open to peer on the little munchkin watched him roll around the room, flip backwards, pop his feet over his head and move faster than any olympic athlete. It was a huge wake up call for me. I knew he was a boy full of beans but I’d underestimated how hard he would struggle. Result: Surprisingly he loved it?

We did it again…similar outcome, he enjoyed it but the progress was minimal. I knew I’d need some patience, but we increased the session to twice a day for just two to three minutes.

Then I was listening to Aaron Doughty on youtube (easy on the eye and brings the healing world an the science world together) and he mentioned that when he meditates he uses a candle. It helps as the mind focus’s on the flame.

Lets give it a go I thought, what can go wrong with a five year old and a live flame? As it turns out – nothing. I edited our practice slightly and we both sat with our eyes open. I reminded him that fire was hot and not to touch it. He sat still and was mesmerised. After a minute in to our practise he whispered “Mummy can I blow the flame out at the end?” I smiled and nodded that he could. At the end he beamed up at me and I said “now you can” and frankly every session ends with a birthday cake celebration, we both even clap.

Like I said this is just the beginning of our journey, he doesn’t always want to do it but I remind him its important, just like brushing our teeth is. We have a way to go, increasing the time, the wiggles and at some point closing our eyes, but its a start.

If you have any tips for meditating, please share below what worked for you?

The Saturday Session #36

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

Sad times for this Mumma as we hit week #36 – its back to work on Monday as the UK half term comes to an end. We’ve been blessed with sun and lots of lovely memories from staying at my Bestie’s (currently typing this in her garden) and I’ve been playing ‘try 6000 dresses on’ as 2019 is the year she is getting hitched. We’ve been on some lovely walks as a Ohana with our dog Moët, met brand new baby Ruby (another lovely friends latest member of the squad), carried a huge inflatable dinosaur everywhere with us, eaten BBQ’s and even accomplished a bit of DIY…win.

Friendship / my tribe is really important to me. I don’t have many friends, but those that I do have are literally my all. This leads me on to my featured blogger for this week – Three Time Daddy.  In one of his recent pieces he discusses an issue his family had when ‘the kids fell out’ and the domino affect it had on his family and how they handled it. Its absolutely worth a click here to read it, I can see as my little dude starts his adventures of school life, how we may face similar situations. I love it when bloggers capture real life situations and what we as readers can take from them. Also anyone who can put out great content and has three kids is amazing in my eyes.

As always, Hayley has picked her own featured bloggers for #thesatsesh so you can always have a cheeky look at her’s too – click to link to her blog or stay here, read the rules below and join week 36 of this lovely community.

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

#5yrs Collect things

~ Fridgesays ~ 13 Comments

For the last two years I’ve documented the little dudes ‘favourites’ with twenty questions. I realise it may not be the most scintillating post to read, but sometimes a Mummy blogger has to be selfish and use her corner of the internet as a place for memories. So far, we are have done this three times and its been interesting to see that he’s like have stayed pretty similar (Mummy was scared School might sanitise his imagination) click here if you’d like to read the previous years post, otherwise enjoy. Let me know if you decide to do, or already do something like this.

1. What’s your favourite colour? Green

2. What’s your favourite toy?   My plastic crocodiles and sharks.

3. What’s your favourite fruit? Banana

4. What do you like to watch on TV? Transformers on DVD (Daddy is creating a retro child)

5. What do you like to eat at lunch? Fish and chips at school on Fridays, with baked beans.

6. Who’s in your family? Mummy, Daddy and Moët…Nanny Bonkers, Nanny Gill, Grandad Tom and Grandad Ken, Nanny Choc choc, Margaret the African snail and Ragnarok the stick insect.

7. What item of clothing do you most like to wear? Jogging bottoms and my pjs. Oh and my favourite costume is…all of them. (J often leaves the house in something from his costume box, today he went out topless with a cape and dagger, it was a strong look)

8. What game do you like to play? On my Leap Frog, Octonauts and Frogs and Friends. Dinosaurs, animals – so many things Mummy.

9. What’s your favourite animal? Tortoise, Hedgehog, Crocodile, Shark and Octopus

10.  What song do you most like? You don’t know me (by Jax Jones feat Raye)

11. What’s your favourite snack? Smokey cheese and Halloumi but not together

12. Favourite book? My new sea monster book, it’s precious (encyclopaedia of prehistoric Sharks and other sea monsters – seriously worth remortgaging the house for)

13. Who’s your best friend? Henry James Garrad.

14. What’s your favourite sport? Obstacle courses and Judo

15. Which holiday do you like the best? The school holidays, (why?) because they are lovely and you get to stay at home.

16. What do you sleep with? Muzzy (Muslin) and my toys, books, anything I can’t sneak in really.

17. What do you like best for breakfast? Rice crispie’s

18. What do you like to do outside? Find mysteries

19. What’s your favourite drink? Lemonade

20. What’s your favourite dinner? I can handle this question easily – pizza. It’s from Italy, all the good for is…Macaroni, pesto pasta and my favourite pizza!!!

The Saturday Session #35

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

Whoop, its not just any linky – its #thesatsesh bank holiday special, also known as week 35. Amazing for bloggers across the globe as we are extending the opening times to 8pm Monday GMT, with an extra 24 hours to play there are no excuses – this means if you are busy in the sun and spending time with loved ones, you still have the opportunity to join the party. (Extra special for Teachers as its also half term – a week of adventures with my little dude)

At the moment its Friday evening, my belly is full from a yummy curry, I am sitting with my bi-fold kitchen window open, at my new bar that the Mr and his mate built me, sun on my back and rosé in my glass – if thats not winning I’m not sure what is?

This notion of winning is completely the opposite of my featured bloggers post. Its titled ‘5 things not to say to someone struggling with depression’ and is written by the talented Naptime Natter creator Wendy. You can click the link here to read all about her top tips, but actually I didn’t pick it for its content. I selected it because I love it when writers create a piece that has heart and raw pain but also in the darkest lines, strands of hope and humour. Its a toxic and delicately balanced recipe for joy and something I think Wendy does so well. As Wendy highlights ‘Cheer up it may never happen’ has to be the cliché of things not to say, but humans are weird at the best of times. My worst insult when I was grieving for my daughter who had passed just months previously was “Do you want to hold my baby? it might make you feel better” needless to say I declined the offer and in my head shoved the baby someone that unlike my bar, the sun doesn’t shine. Please give Wendy the love that her blog of joy deserves, or just scroll over to Hayley’s blog to see who she has selected as her featured blogger by clicking here.

The rules to week 35 are just the same as previously BUT with the bonus 24 hours typing time. Have a peek below if you are in doubt, or click the blue box below.

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Good shoes take you to good places.

~ Fridgesays ~ 21 Comments

Quote by Seo Min Hyun

When my son started school I took a photo of his new shoes, not him by the front door like every other home, but of his new shoes. I then realised something about myself, I mark chapters of my life with my passion for footwear, mainly heels.

Shoes speak to my soul. I have fond memories of going to Russell and Bromley as a child to be fitted for my ‘Start Rite Mary Jane’s’ in the latest colour. The child section was up a winding staircase (totally impractical for parents and little ones), it had a light fluffy carpet and around the edge of the room was a huge, long tropical fish tank. The shoes were expensive, lasted and made me feel like a princess. The new shoe box was often held by me on the journey home (except for, on the winding staircase previously mentioned) with pride and my collection over the years has grown and only increased in quality.

I have high heels that make me smile; some symbolise the break up of previous relationships, I always buy new school shoes for the new term and have shoes purchased following births, deaths and marriages.

I’m not that fond of bags….an impractical sparkly clutch bag and I’m happy. Life is too short for practical black/neutral bags and frankly I take my hat off to those that change their bag daily…hmmm hats I don’t do those either?

I don’t have shoes for every occasion, just shoes that make me smile, feel happy or in some way complete. I only own two black pairs of shoes, may be three (?) and I don’t tend to buy shoes that are cheap and as a result have never suffered with rubbing or blisters. I don’t wear shoes for comfort because how they make me feel is more important.

I asked my son about this quote and in he’s five year old wisdom he said “What’s a good place?” he raises a good point. A good place to me will be different to your perception of a ‘good place’ perhaps thats why there are so many places and so many types of shoes? In my life I plan to go onwards and upwards, it makes sense that a pair of eight or ten inch heel’s are my best companion.

Perhaps, living life in comfort is a priority for you, may be you are simple in expectations and live life exposed – the flip flop may be your choice of footwear?

My son, predictably likes wellies, adventurous and practical in the UK. Quick to put on and in some jarring design.

I make judgements about people on their shoes, do they care about themselves, do they look after themselves / are we compatible? What would your shoes tell me about you and where is it taking you?

The Saturday Session #34

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

img_4001

Welcome to week 34 of #thesatsesh .This weekend I plan on focusing on breathing, seriously that week was like surviving a whirl wind. You know you’re old when you’re excited because you don’t have any plans…thats my weekend, so I’m going to feel it with chill time, forrest walks and some meditation. Anything more and I’m not sure I could cope.

Each week myself and my super mum cohost Hayley pick a featured blogger each, you can click here to see who she has picked, or keep reading as I reveal mine.

My featured blogger really got me thinking about boredom. Andy from Dads sofa discussed the issue, so much so that I think I might write my own post on the topic. You can read Andy’s interpretation here. In essence how reliant we are on our mobile devices for entertainment and to kill those awkward waiting moments in the day…some children need them to occupy them in queue’s or restaurants but actually theres a learning curve in waiting, in patience and in occupying yourself. Andy’s post is simple and to the point, I always enjoy his humour and would definitely like to sit on his sofa at some point in the future and share a cuppa. I imagine its full of laughter and moments of pure joy…who knows perhaps we could just chill and share some boredom time?

If you’d like to be considered as this week’s featured blogger or just have great content to show, have a peek at the rules below and click the blue box! All posts, genres and bloggers welcome – even the boring ones 🙂

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Failure is a bruise not a tattoo

~ Fridgesays ~ 21 Comments

Quote by Jon Sinclair

We are designed to be learning machines and at the same time are absolutely terrified of doing something wrong? Weird or what.

Surely to learn you have to do something incorrectly to work out where you’re going wrong and amend it. If you are blessed to have somebody guide you through a new process then that’s amazing, it eases the journey and hopefully makes the process quicker.

Let me list some failures in my last twenty four hour existence.

  • At work the leavers got hoodies with the wrong names on
  • Came home to the Mr cooking dinner – several hours later I asked where the meal was (he hadn’t put the oven on)
  • A social worker didn’t turn up for a meeting, shouted at our reception staff and then I sent her the email feed where she changed the date.
  • I was in a group dance and probably went the wrong way
  • I was going to have a chocolate and ate ten

Okay, so not the end of the world, minor hiccups that can be sorted…wait what? Failures aren’t permanent, the world doesn’t stop…life will go on?

Often when I’m doing grief counselling the child will be disappointed that when their loved one died, the world didn’t stop. How can they feel so very low and yet the rest of the world continues to spin?

Failure is a perception in a moment in time, it’s actually not a helpful word either. I will not gain weight because of those ten chocolates that I scoffed. I will have a sugar high and it will quickly be followed by a sluggish low. I will not be unloved by my family because of this, I will not die. The world will continue to spin.

Thought: if we gave our accomplishments as much thought, momentum and time as we did the errors in our day, how much better would we feel? How much would life improve and how much more would we enjoy eating chocolate. Don’t ever get a tattoo that makes you feel sad every time you look at it, surely permanent moments are made for happy thoughts, quotes and images, apply that to life and you’re winning.

The Saturday Session #33

~ Fridgesays ~ 2 Comments

Welcome back to the linky thats full of love, hugs and self care. I hope the week treated you well and please use the hashtag #thesatsesh on Instagram / twitter to keep us updated on your weekend antics.

I often have trouble picking who will be my featured blogger, but this week I knew as I read the title that this post was something that would resonate with me. ‘How to practise self care’ is something I am passionate about. Inner love enhances all our relationships and frankly I’ll take any excuse for five minutes out of the rat race. The legendary Spectrum Mum has recently taken a leap of faith with a new direction to her blog – it paid off in my opinion and I love reading her ideas, perceptions and visions. The post linked above has a TED talk in it too (bonus) and I watched it whilst eating breakfast to add extra fuel to my day. Dr Guy Winch has a few TedTalks and they all are under 20 minutes and always easily found on YouTube. Catie also provided a list of things you can do if you are looking to enhance your go-to self care routine, as someone thats a pro at making time for myself, I still found a good few ideas on there. My new favourite this week is a spotify playlist called ‘Summer BBQ’ its so upbeat and eclectic, it really lifts my mood and some of the random tracks have been really nostalgic and not necessarily tracks I’d personally pick – but also absolute tunes in there own right! (Currently listening to One Love by B.Marley right now)

Now, lets unleash week thirty three – thanks for taking time to link, or use this as a really awesome way to read new material. Have a peek at the rules below and don’t forget to check out who my sassy cohost Hayley has picked as her featured blogger by clicking the link here 🙂

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

She acts like summer and walks like rain

~ Fridgesays ~ 20 Comments

Lyrics by Train.

Sometimes a quote speaks to my soul. This is me at my very best.

My happy place. Light on my feet, smelling like sunshine (citrus and sun tan lotion spring to mind). Summer is carefree, adventurous and for me a vacation from the dark winter nights and long working days.

Sometimes summer can be ‘too’ hot and you can feel frazzled, sore and sweaty – rain can be torrential, devastating to flood plains and has horrendous qualities in abundance and drought. When I lose my sense of centre and get ‘scorched from the sun’ or when my work load is drowning me…. I go to this quote. It instantly makes me feel happy. It lifts my soul and this is why I find the power of reading and writing to be therapeutic. It can realign and invigorate me. So in case you thought this blog had all the answers, it’s simply a place where I remind myself of my inner summer. Keep shining, dance in the rain and find your centre spot because that’s winning and everything else is just a distraction.