inspire

You’ll turn out ordinary if you’re not careful

~ Fridgesays ~ 43 Comments

Quote by Ann Brashares.

This quote made me smile. So many people of all ages lack a love for themselves. Why? Most of us are trying to be someone we aren’t. Perhaps not all of the time, but as we juggle all of the various hats on that we wear throughout the day we prefer the fit of some and hide behind others.

During my early teaching years I tried to emulate colleagues who I thought did the job well, or teachers who taught me. It didn’t work. It wasn’t me.

As a mother that was an entirely new hat (complete with ruined core muscles) that took a while to fit. I needed my hat adjusted as I took on the new role. To work out who my mum tribe was, to raise my little dude in our own way and to adjust the hat to fit me. I can’t mum like my mother did, I’m not her, although she is an amazing example, I’m raising my child in a different era with a new journey ahead of us. It took a while and needs constant adjusting but my mum hat is bespoke. It’s me and it fits like a dream.

I’m not sure anyone is happy to live an ordinary life, I think we would all opt for sparkle and quirk. However, there are a few things you need to do to live this life.

  • You need to be brave, to step away from the crowds when it doesn’t suit you.
  • You need a tribe around you that accepts you, cracks an’ all.
  • You need time to yourself, balanced with time with loved ones. There is a lot of research to suggest we ‘are’ the five people we spend the most time with. If these people are ordinary so are you.

I can’t juggle my ever growing hat stand without time for myself; to be creative, to be healthy and to be quiet. The world is a whirl of distractions and so I need to breath and pause, to check I’m on the pathway that best fits me.

This week perhaps you need to check your own hat stand out. The hats that are last season, the hats you hate, the hats you wear because everybody else does. Perhaps it’s even time to buy a new hat. Just make sure the hats are your own design and not made for somebody else.

Happy hat shopping.

Little by little…

~ Fridgesays ~ 30 Comments

A Tanzanian proverb that filled by cup.

Today I want to talk about celebrating. I learnt this from a online entrepreneur who I follow on social media called Lana; she does youtube clips, blogs, master classes and all sorts of delightful enriching and motivating things. I may even be like her when I grow up (although I think she might be the same age as me, plus I do have plans to be a Mermaid). She celebrates anything and everything and lately I have discovered the joy of  celebrating in other people accomplishments. As a British citizen it is by nature that I am meant to be ‘pleased’ for others but not really show it, kick others down where possible and as a women there is also this catty nature of not raise each other up.

Not on my watch.

This week my heart broke for the talented blogger Wendy who is responsible for the fabulous site Naptime natter, as her son was rushed into hospital extremely ill and with doctors not really able to tell her what it was (although thank heavens it wasn’t Meningitis). Through Instagram she shared her worries, thoughts and it gave me and others an opportunity to send her some much needed love. (The blogging community rocks at times), however today (22.02.18) the photograph we had all been waiting for was released – they are home safely. Hurray for medical expertise, the power of positive thinking and her child being a little warrior.  I do not know her, but I felt relieved. I commented that I’d be celebrating this weekend and I blooming well will did. I opted for a cocktail and toasted her families triumph. I then toasted and was/am grateful for my own families health. Celebrating makes you feel good. Celebrating for others is also super fun. My last Champagne toast was for a friends birthday (even though she wasn’t really celebrating herself or with me), in the week little dude bought a beautiful piece of work home – we celebrated, this time with a more appropriate child friendly hot chocolate (with whipped cream), later that week we celebrated again with a pizza party thanks to a sticker regarding his improvements in reading. *note to self: not all my celebrations are food motivated.

Life is too short and like the quote states – too little, to wait for my next birthday, invite to a party or even Christmas. The journey is more joyful with little moments of celebration and recognition as you go…a little celebration makes for a life of parties. That’s the kind of life I’m interesting in living.

Interested in the party lifestyle? Time for some homework: this week I urge you to celebrate as many times as possible. When your child read’s well, blow up some balloons that you’ve got stashed in the draw. When a friend tells you they have a promotion – toast that! When you get some social media comments that make you smile, dance. Seriously, spontaneous dance parties in my kitchen are very common and a bonus is you can burn calories that you can then use later in celebration of something else. (Oops the good things back again)

Its often the little moments, the little wins and the little memories that stay with you. Create some fun this week and comment below with your antics (I can then use these as an excuse to further rejoice in).

I like my music so loud I can’t hear my thoughts

~ Fridgesays ~ 37 Comments

Quote Anon.

We are a musical family. My record player is blasting from the kitchen, in the car the base is always turned up and even in bed I often hit Spotify for some relaxing melodies to drift me off to the land of nod, bath music is often classical and did I mention music in the garden too. However, one thing is true – I adore my music turned up loud.

My personal music collection is eclectic and I tend to pick a different genre depending on the time of day, mood I’m in or mood I wish to create.

There is also a power in the silent moment of life which id like to acknowledge and have previously written about. However, when my mind is overloaded with lists of things to do, or if I’m building myself up for the day ahead – I often quieten my brain with my music turned up LOUD. I am totally a karaoke car Queen. I also thankful to Bluetooth, which means people now think I’m on the phone rather than giving myself a pep talk, raving, jiving or am a pop princess. Sometimes I make up lyrics to classical pieces (warning this is a simple way to destroy the power of Mozart in seconds), however if you often get anxious, are an over thinker or generally find your brain a hard place to be then music can be a pleasant vacation; you also don’t need to prebook via a travel agent, it’s often free and jet lag never occurs. In my opinion the louder the better helps to push away the outside distractions and internal frustrations.

How do you use music to control your emotions?

Don’t be bitter. Be better

~ Fridgesays ~ 28 Comments

Quote by Habeeb Akande

Welcome fridgesays peeps, this week we are letting go of the bitterness and being better. This sounds simple. In cooking it would equate to a basic sponge cake or a classic scone. However, in my experience the simplest of things are sometimes super hard to make. The sponge can lack a fluffy texture and the scones can be too hard or stodgy.

When I’m feeling bitter (often) it’s easy to compare what others aren’t doing, what they are ‘getting away with’ or just judge with bitterness and disgust, sometimes this can be therapeutic but hold on to the bitterness for too long and if we return to our cake recipes, you’ve just added lemon and lime to a scone and grapefruit to a sponge cake…it’s going to repeat in your mouth, taste ‘unique’ and not be as good as it could be.

My recipe recommendation: It would be easy to say ‘don’t be bitter’ but sometimes a little lime slips into life’s chaotic moments, instead I say, cover that cake in cream and jam.

Jam and cream can make just about anything taste good and in life these are the lovely moments. Instead of becoming bitter of others, reflect on what went well in your day. Gratitude is the cream and jam of life, those little moments of triumph, those sparkles of joy and best of all…they make us better or will at least help us to get to a place where we aren’t moaning about others but are focusing on what we did well.

A better me, makes a better mummy, teacher, friend or family member. So why not leave the lemon and limes for a cocktail and enjoy the cake of life.

Remind yourself that you cannot fail at being you.

~ Fridgesays ~ 30 Comments

Quote by Wayne Dyer.

As we approach the end of the first month of 2018, I felt this quote resonated with every human on the planet who had set a new goal, challenge or New Years resolution. Particularly those who have already hung up their gym pass, quit the diet or has found their soul drowned in another bowl of soup… it happens.

For goal setting targets I’ve written several posts Click here to read why it pays to be stubborn but at perhaps a time that you have ‘failed’ ‘given up’ or realised that dry January isn’t an excuse to drink gin for a month (*I was sad when I heard this too) I want to remind you that you are awesome just the way you are. Sounds sickly I know, but it’s true. You are good at being you. I promise that if you have kids they love our imperfections and all; although I wouldn’t directly ask them. This week I curled my hair and my son (four years old) told me I looked like Rapunzel. As a Disney fan I was blown away – until he corrected me that it was the witch he was thinking of.

I don’t want to bring my children up in a world where perfection is ‘plastic fantastic’ where desirable looks can only be accomplished by a thousand filters and the social media acceptance of an abundance of hearts, likes and comments. I don’t want humans to become robotic and only come in ‘one size fits all’, our imperfections create our beauty.

We all have talents that vary from scientist geniuses, medicinal wizards and international superstars… I make a fantastic roast, can occupy a toddler in a car for multiple hours and give good hugs (not all at the same time), I make a good friend, kind teacher and feel accomplished most days.

As we jump into February I urge you to take five minutes, pour a coffee and write a list of everything you like about yourself. I advise you to be kind to yourself; treat yourself to those new jeans, the shoes or that ‘thing’ that floats your boat. If I was a doctor I would prescribe you with a luxury treatment, a trip to the cinema, or a date night that’s overdue… if you have a new born then I’m adding a hot drink to that prescription. Allow February to be the month you made time for self love, for gratitude for all you do have. I promise it’s more than most.

You’re the best and being you. You’re already winning in 2018, you don’t need to change a thing.

Don’t raise your voice, improve your argument

~ Fridgesays ~ 27 Comments

Quote from Desmond Tutu.

As I read this quote I couldn’t believe the depth of truth in so few words.

When I began working in a school I had the opportunity to work with a experienced teacher called Violet. She was originally from Ghana and she controlled the class with consistency and a whispered voice. To see her teach was an honour. The loudest and most brutal child from London was putty in her hands. To hear her they had to listen carefully. Plus, as I quickly realised – she was always right. She didn’t need to raise her voice, there was an inner calmness and it was magical to watch.

In our home voices aren’t usually raised (unless I’m singing) we tend to bicker it out, not that I’m sure this is any better? However, in the classroom I only tend to raise my voice to give instructions, particularly when the students are absorbed in the previous activity.

This quote is going to find its way on to my classroom wall. As I work in an all girls school they can be LOUD. Teenagers are often full of opinions and willing to express their distaste should anyone disagree. It makes sense that we are at our most vocal during our teen years, as we find our way through societies behaviour patterns, rebel and with a little magic come out unscathed in our mid twenties.

As I age (like a fine wine) I have become quieter (but in no way quiet) the hot air of my twenties is behind me. I cringe at some of the arguments I’ve had in the past and can see that with age comes a better understanding of ourselves and as Desmond suggested – an improvement in argument.

This week I’m going to consciously listen to arguments and how loud the voice of the weaker disputer is.

The Saturday Session #19

~ Fridgesays ~ 3 Comments

Whoosh and other week speeds past. This week I have totally won at life, why I hear you cry from the far corners of the globe? Well basically Ive successfully juggled work and play. I’ve ticked my to do list, as well as made time for myself and some indulgent moments, I am definitely enjoying 2018 and long may the successful juggling continue.

Which connects me beautifully on to my featured blogger from week 18. When I read her blog it seems to me that she is living fiercely, boldly and with risk…not to mention enjoying the journey – Rose Tinted Ramblings of a life less ordinary , these attributes are certainly something which I find magical. Plus, she drive a pink car – whats not to love. Click the link above to read about her first solo exhibition. Despite loving every second and going for it, she also captures her anticipation and anxiety beautifully. Often anxiety is seen as a mental health issue and connected to worry, but I really do see anxiety as showing you care and when used to drive the vision of you dreams, its often complimented by accomplishment. This lady could teach the world a thing or two.

Hayley, my cohost has been utterly greedy this week and gone for two featured bloggers, by clicking here you can take a peek at who stole her heart.

Without delay, lets launch week 19 of #thesatsesh and get this party started. Here are a few quick rules and normal linky etiquette.

RULES

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t. 

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Make it pop like pink Champagne.

~ Fridgesays ~ 32 Comments

Quote from the lyrics of Ariana Grande. I’m totally using this quote as an excuse to open a bottle of pink bubbles (you know for photography authenticity)

I have a secret, which if you ever met me isn’t the greatest secret ever. In my head I am a fairy. When I first met Mr F he named part of my personality as ‘Fairy’, this is the ditzy blonde, petite and often totally mistaken element of me, this is the part of me that didn’t realise that cars gave way on roundabouts in the UK to the right…until I had at least ten years of driving experience (I just thought people were kind) and Mr F pointed this out…ops! Fairy is also identified when I sing the wrong lyrics out loud incorrectly clueless to my own error, when I suddenly realise that things aren’t pronounced or therefore spelt how I thought they were for the last thirty years; examples include ‘Ham bags’ (leather…meat, it made sense in my head?) or that I drove through Blackwall Tunnel for several years oblivious to the Thames water over my head.

However, my definition of me as a fairy is magical. I have secret powers. Technically, we all have these powers but I harness them whilst many wallow in misery and self doubt…the secret power I possess is that I fully believe that the thoughts I have become my reality. I notice my thoughts, pay attention to them and go out of my way to avoid negative people. I am mindful in how I perceive others and more importantly myself. I don’t let myself indulge in ‘mindLESS’ entertainment on TV. I continuously cultivate my mind daily. Some days I am successful, other days I don’t always fully succeed – but I always go to sleep reflecting on what I did do well.

A few weeks a go I went to a funeral of a lovely member of my family. She was such a huge character and as I reflected on how grateful I was to have had her in my life. I realised that in other conversations around the room people chatted of mundane tales of life and that the highlights were sharing tales of her that made us laugh, giggle and reflect. Stories that stirred a ‘Pop pink Champagne’ reaction within us. Listening to the fizz and delight of life (seriously how lovely is that noise), perhaps you are more a ‘cold pint with moustache’ kinda dude or a warming ‘mulled wine’ worldly woman – what ever life’s tipple is, shouldn’t that be a daily goal for us all? * I’m not suggesting we all become alcoholics, this is just an analogy, I am suggesting that we make time to enjoy life even in the bleaker moments.

As a Fairy, I am 100% a pink Champagne popping princess. This analogy isn’t about financial wealth, but to me a quality product, with an edge (its pink), with a beauty, vitality and energy (the pop), an energy that makes others who sample its delight feel special. A treat. For me an indulgent necessity.

Pink Champagne is chilled, it knows when to make noise (back to the pop again) and when to settle in the glass, when to tingle of the tongue – best of all, it looks at life through rose tinted ‘glasses’ and always makes me want to dance. Its this description of life that I aspire to.

What’s your tipple of life?

I’m realistic, I expect miracles

~ Fridgesays ~ 28 Comments

Quote by Wayne Dyer

This quote totally sums me up. My head is in the clouds and my high heels are firmly on the ground.

At the beginning of a new year it’s naturally to look ahead, to book new adventures and reflect on the previous year. It’s an opportunity to readjust and redirect your journey.

I’m not particularly a fan of making drastic changes, I’ve worked too hard to love me as me. As a result a new year doesn’t need to be a new you either. But a new direction, motivation or goal is always a blessing.

As a Teacher I have two New Years; the school year and the calendar year. Back in September I set a goal to see more theatre and I’m excelling, this is something I hope to continue into 2018. I’m always appreciative of any recommendations.

Travel is always a goal for me. I can’t wait to see where my suitcase and passport will take us this year.

If you are setting goals, make sure you are also open to opportunities and experiencing an abundant lifestyle rather than just creating a list of all the things you are going to cut out. After all, magical things can only happen when you are open to receiving them.

As I jump into the pool of January 2018 I am totally realistic about how epic it will be. I also hope that miracles bless your year and look forward to the magic that lies ahead.

Bread and water can easily be toast and tea

~ Fridgesays ~ 37 Comments

Quote Anon, but I wouldn’t mind betting the writer was English.

A stereotype that I completely fall in to is my love for a cup of tea and I’m also partial to a slice of toast. Toppings vary but somehow melted organic butter (no manufactured margarine in this house) usually hits the spot. Women in UK hospitals are often given tea and toast after labour and so many of my friends mention it as one of the best meals of their lives.

However, like many of the quotes I resonate with, this is all about perspective. I was listening to the classic Christmas track ‘Do they know it’s Christmas’ and couldn’t help thinking, do they care? It would seem to me and many of my friends who have travelled to parts of Africa that they are happier than us without snow and tinsel. Being a glitter fan, I think a row of sparkly lights would enhance Africa but ultimately they are content without much of the nonsense we in the consumerism world feel are necessities. This I feel is something we should all take note of.

Happiness is a choice. Perhaps water and bread is something many of us take for granted and may be even some of us forget the joy of a cuppa and a slice of toast. This winter, I shall be looking for the joy in the simple treasures, they’re always the best. I like a glass of water when it is cold out of the tap, we always have wholemeal bread – therefore a fresh white cottage loaf from our local bakers its heavenly, cut thick with butter (obvs). There can be joy in bread and water too, should you choose to notice.

I’m editing this post on Christmas Eve. Its my favourite day of the festive season. Its like standing on the cusp of excitement. The presents neatly stacked, awaiting Father Christmas’s arrival, friends for Breakfast (seriously how good are homemade Pancakes, crispy bacon and maple syrup), a bucks fizz with friends, a trip to the local with our neighbours…a slow walk home in the dark (our village doesn’t have street lights) and admiring the houses with their Christmas lights shining bright….then a family tradition of a large cheesy pizza and watching Home Alone. Nice.

Before you get caught in the whirl of Christmas, take a pause and absorb the joy. There is always a sparkle to be found, should you choose to see it.

Merry Christmas to all and to all, a Cheese pizza night.