To live would be an awfully big adventure 

~ Fridgesays ~ 14 Comments

Quote by J.M.Barrie or Peter Pan depending on your outlook.Wise words from a character who didn’t want to grow up.

Before writing this post I was blow drying my hair and thinking about what it would be like to wear Beyonce’s shoes for a day (like you do) and despite the travelling id be surprised if she has actually seen much of the world and perhaps more rehearsal studios and hotel suites than people may think. I wonder if she likes being Beyonce? Or sometimes wants to drink actual Lemonade and inhale carbohydrates like she’s an extra in ‘Bridget Jones diary’, to stay in one place long enough to get bored or to pop around Walmart without security and leave the media perceptions behind. Perhaps she has days where she wants to give up the fame and be a stay at home Mum – don’t all Parents do that on hectic days?

Then I thought that from the many blogs I’ve read many parents that stay at home also work, perhaps not full time – many write that they miss adult company and then I got deep…and posed a question to myself. If it was my last day on earth what would I look back on? What should I have done differently? Did I live a good adventure?

The answer was yes, even in comparison to Beyonce – sure I haven’t gone on world tour, sold a ridiculous number of albums, won Grammies and shaken my bootie to its full potential…my adventure isn’t meant to be that of a World class musician, ten seconds of ‘The wheels on the bus’ causes my sons to shout out “Mummy, no more” my singing voice puts terror into any innocent nursery rhyme – but I’m learning and evolving in so many other ways. Each day I’m working on how to be a better Mum, a top notch Teacher, to stay in a productive and exciting relationship – to not kill said relationship because I’m hormonal and he has left his shoes by the backdoor

*note to him: the shoe rack is clearly at the front of the house in the porch, please use it.

So as each day passes and you write your next chapter, don’t be like Peter Pan and hide from growing up, living the same story of fighting Hook every day. To face fears and wear super high heels is super fun, to pick Holiday locations and be in charge of the passports is empowering and to live to your capabilities and beyond is my perception of this quote. 

To confront anxieties in small bite size chunks is hugely empowering and ‘living your adventure’, to over come barriers, to not get caught in gossip or surround yourself by negative voices

  • If you aren’t sure how you could begin this journey, there is one simple step that many people have found useful….say yes more often.

Have an awesome week, stop comparing yourself to others (I’ll work on not comparing my life to Beyoncé) and live to reach your goals by saying yes and perhaps even excelling the odd capability or three as you go.


 

Dont ruin a good day because of a bad yesterday

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Quote by Grant Cardone
Seriously, this quote is my world right now. I’m a natural positive butterfly – but I’m human too. On bad days people still expect me to be sunshine and full Disney Princess sparkle when I’m actually feeling more Hulk.

Yesterday afternoon I was Hulk. I am able to catch myself in a negative frame of mind, but frankly sometimes I like to wallow in green fury for a little too long or just don’t have the energy to dust myself off and spread pixie dust wherever I go.

By half eight on a Saturday night I decided to let it all go and snuggled in bed. Adulting can be tough and sometimes just like my toddler in the midday heat – I need to nap it off

*Advice: never go to sleep feeling low, you will wake up feeling like you have a hangover and that is the epitome of miserable.

To ‘let it go’ I usually escape into a good book or emerge myself with silly YouTube clips (cute puppies, infectious baby giggles, or stupid people falling off of trampolines) until I’m tired enough to sleep and the immature giggles have lifted my soul.

Today is actually the real test. I don’t need the negativity of yesterday to ruin my today. To do this I make a choice to smile and always choose happiness…it’s hard work, as negative thoughts are like a poison that slip through gaps and as each day brings new challenges and opens new doors it can contaminate in seconds. This quote is more of a mantra to me that I reflect on when the responsibility of being an adult sucks.

Finance, childcare, chores and relationships can be all consuming. That and an unpredictable three year old that can have a emotional breakdown because the grass is green and he wants it to be blue, are all challenges that I attempt to make positive – I laugh at my child’s demands (warning: this sometimes frustrates him further) and I do the chores I can fit into my day without making ‘cleaning’ my entire day; the vacuuming can always wait till tomorrow, life as we know it will continue (with just a bit more dust around).

As for finance, I reflect on that I have it better than others, that bad months will come and good months will help us save for the rainy tsunami days, another quote that works well with this is John Lennon’s “Everything will be okay in the end, if its not Okay then its not the end”

With fresh eyes and a nights sleep today will be better and through this energy attraction, life in turn will be better. So here’s to choosing to see life through Disney Princess glasses, for now my Hulk is back to his human persona Bruce Banner…

Stay blessed this week, and for those who caught in your own ‘Hulk days’ here is a list of sources that can possibly help you break free. (if you’d like to know more about any in particular please ask and i’ll do a post on it in the near future)

  • Meditation (Headspace do a good app that provides an easy to follow starting point)
  • EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) Matrix reimprinting
  • Lightning Process (not quite as cool as it sounds, but almost)
  • NLP (Neur0 Linguistic Programming)
  • Yoga

And the simple stuff from taking a walk, going to the gym, along drive or putting on your favourite tracks

I’d love to hear any of your suggestions; fill free to leave any below

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lovely things #10

~ Fridgesays ~ 2 Comments

May days were quick and gone before I could really get a feel for them. The weather was glorious or horrendous (with nothing In between) and with half term waving May days behind us adventures and snoozy mornings in bed were plenty.

I have a new promise that I’m trying to keep – I can’t stop ‘instagraming’ food pictures, seriously check out @fridgesays and follow me. It’s like a midlife photo crisis and so lovely things this month will not include a single food photo.

1. Walks with my boys.

With a Labrador and a little man in tow, walks can be messy and usually have some sort of water fun / mud through the kitchen element. However, one dry morning early this week we enjoyed a walk through our local woods and beyond. Thanks to Daddy ‘Elephant rides’ (shoulders) we were able to ‘mooch’ about four or so miles and it was simple family time that I’d like to bottle. I was on ‘oh pretty flower’ task force and these little beauties seemed to have ended up on our mantel piece.

2. After having a baby (as in he is three and I still haven’t fully recovered) finding a sense of identity can be hard. One thing that has been neglected on my happiness radar is baking. As I promised no food pics you’ll have to make do with below; needless to say half term had been ‘back to baking for me’ and I’ve relished every moment. 

3. We don’t watch tv very often in our home, for the first few years together we didn’t even own one. Mr Fridges Nan thought that we were odd and kindly bought us one. I guess she was right to an extent, but we mainly use it for films…the image below however is out of the shed and in full use and it brings me so much joy. We usually sit outside with a bottle of wine, a Spotify playlist and just chat until the wine runs out. It’s fab to connect as a couple and secretly brings out the arsonist in me – who is usually told to step away from the flames.

So I guess as usual I’m enjoying the simple things in life, which is ironic as my head is usually full of complicated desires. Either way I’m loving being outside and enjoying any sunshine Mother Nature can provide.

I used to hope you’d bring me flowers…

~ Fridgesays ~ 2 Comments

Quote by the outrageous ‘Anon’
*sorry for the terrible photo quality…reflection / tone, it’s all just wrong.

But the quote speaks volumes to me.

On a personal level my Dad is my first hero. I guess I’ve waited my entire life to find the ‘one’, then when I found my prince he was a miserable git and not exactly the ‘charming’ that my Disney childhood had foreseen…but then Prince C didn’t have a good bicep, an impressive tricep and the banter only a doorman could have. Let’s be honest prince C was a bit of a Ken Barbie doll (and I prefer Action man). Early in our relationship I told him something that was so true in my twenties. Don’t ever buy me cut flowers…they look fabulous and then you sit them in a vase and watch them die – seriously depressing. Then I grew older, used my femine powers and changed my mind. He still stands by my original request and now I’m literally forced to buy myself flowers.

*note to him or anyone: I love being bought flowers.

I guess however this quote goes a little deeper, it’s not about flowers but making your own happiness. Under fridge philosophy (yeah that’s a thing now) I have to agree. Happiness is like a contagious snotty cold, but with less snot and a more powerful energy source than Dyson could invent. When I’m happy the world moves with me and even in darkness only knocks me slightly from my path. Along this path I attract positive energy and this only increased my super power. The choice to be happy.

If I could tell my teenage self one thing, it would be ‘that you choose to be happy’, my friends, family or the lastest NAF NAF tshirt can’t help you either, however in a positive moment family and friends can enhance your flight, and its a precious journey that is sacred.

Growing your own flowers to me is also about sowing the seeds of dreams and goals and seeing them to fruition. I don’t need a charming prince to ‘get me’ a castle, nor do i need him to make me happy. I do need my own goals (the soil), some action and motivation from within (the seeds) and then the positive motion to fuel my growth (water and sun), sure every now and then a slug will come and take a bite out of my dreams, redirect me or even reduce me to a sluggish mess…but it is also me that will get back up and rock my new snail trail sparkle.

So this week no matter what life throws at you. Choose happiness and for god sake buy yourself some flowers and don’t ever feel guilty.

To have great poets…

~ Fridgesays ~ 4 Comments

Quote by Walt Whitman

Now not that you aren’t a fab audience but I love to write poetry and keep it to myself. It’s a stress reliever – I’ve also not matured in the poet sense of appreciation and so all my poems HAVE to rhymn, a bit like a seven year old…goat, bloat and float, you get the level of my pen and paper ability?

Maybe in time I will post some, I write it in the most sparkly note book known to pen kind..with sparkly water melon pieces all over it. Amazing 🙂


Poetry allows me to regress in to a magical world (enhanced by sparkly watermelon pieces) and together they also bring me closer to my Grandad who passed away too long ago. He was amazing at so many things, creative, fixing things, making me smile, and he also was a kind soul…he sucked at cooking, and his driving was ‘unique’, he was also horrified when my little cousins named there Guinea Pig after him (hehe)  but after he passed away the family found a book of pencilled poetry / lymrics that he had created. Sadly the pencil had faded but through the pages I found a love and a passion that I wasn’t aware of, a new aspect of my Grandads’ personality. This blog is obviously a public creative outlet for me, unlike my poems which are a little closer to my heart.

Wellbeing and balance are so essential, I hope I never stop writing about them. I completely see why colouring for adults has taken the world by storm and also why so many are drawn to it (drawn hehe), I plan to give it ago later this year (for some reason I think I need to be snuggled by a fire with a hot drink for me to colour in?)

Do you have a creative outlet or have you tried colouring in for a sense of calm / wellbeing? If so I’d love to hear from you.

Before I finish this piece however, I feel it necessary to also agree with the quote above. Walt makes a very important point and since the current UK education system seems to be slashing the arts in our schools I feel its essential that our children are able to experience and share art (in whatever form it resonates with them) and also to say that Drama in particularly was key to my growth, my wellbeing and my education. Seeing audiences relate to my characters has given me a sense of worth that allowed me to flourish, to take on more diverse roles and those skills are ingrained in my soul and make me who I am. So to all the audiences (paid, bribed or in rehearsal) who ever watched and reflected; thank you.

No one is you and that is your power 

~ Fridgesays ~ 7 Comments

Quote by Dave Grohl
You can’t say my choice of quotes isn’t diverse; we’ve gone from Greek mythology, 19th century writers, a splash of Dolly Parton (everyone needs a splash every now and then) the epic ‘Anon’ and now Nivanas Drummer / lead singer of the Foo Fighters – a bloke called Dave.

Dave is talented; not only within the making music movement, but he makes an awesome speech and inspiration is his fuel. It makes sense that ‘What my fridge says’ would want to absorb it.

Today we wandered  through Brighton and soaked up the sun – it’s a diverse pallete of people wearing conventional Marks and Sparks cardigans to free loving folk ozzing in fabric and clashing patterns, Punks, 1950’s inspired fashion and so much more. And I love it.

I love to see people not looking like clones, throwing out a little ‘I’m me’, I find it humbling in a world that’s media usually preaches what’s acceptable. That and the candy floss are some of my favourite aspects of Brighton. 

Perhaps you’re going to an interview soon and are worried about the competition – don’t just be you, that’s your secret power.

May be you’re not happy in your relationship; tell them why, work at it or leave – your voice can be your power.

In a world where they’re many leaders, it’s ok to be a follower, it’s ok to have hobbies and everyone has interests – these qualities make you magical.

You are magical

You are talented

You are the most important person in your world, not your children, not your partner or even the dog…because without you where would they be?

Be the best you and the world feels amazing. Happiness will flow from you and others will light up in your company…

Your super power is you. Empowered but confused how you unleash your true power? it all begins with the spoken word. Complement others, stand up for your rights and especially those whose voice is muted for whatever reason, keep talking and ‘you’ will see your power unleashed.

Thanks Dave for reminding us our most important lesson 🙂 and reminding us of our ultimate power. 

It’s easy to be brave from a distance

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Proverb by Aesop 

This reminds me of the playground as a fight breaks out. Not the actual fight, but the pathetic individuals that are choosing to stand by and watch. Lapping up the atmosphere of negativity, encouraging the fight with chants that will haunt the victim scrabbling on the floor well into their forties.

Am I against fighting? Not at all – Marshall arts has done more for resilience building that any leadership training course I’ve ever been part of, Boxing and MMA needs spectators and is an awesome all round fitness sport…but when questioning the children standing around the edge they aren’t the confident individuals they were during the chant, nor are they brave.

Brave is the kid that stands between them, stupid is the teacher at 4ft11 (over 5ft in my heels) who’s adrenaline places them in between and who’s voice booms a clear instruction to stop, that desperses the crowd…

How often have I left a conversation with a parent or manager and wishes i’d said something else, how many hours have I reinacted conversations in my head about ‘what I should of said’…these to are not brave. 

Brave is standing by what you know is right. I’d be hypocritical to say I always do this – it’s something you have to be aware of, to engage in the moment. Sometimes no matter how transparent we are, curbing our thoughts and preventing them forming into words is just as brave. In 2006 I found a motto to life that has stuck with me (I nearly got the Latin translation tattooed on me; don’t panic Mum it never happened) and that is…

‘If you do something with good intentions, only good can come from it’

Even if you’ve seriously made an error in judgement, with good intentions comes good vibes and ultimately a less severe consequence for everyone involved. 

So while I get back to the playground, be brave and always say what you think is best in the moment, act in the moment and never judge from a distance – because that’s easy and you’re better than that.

Weird is a side effect of awesome

~ Fridgesays ~ 12 Comments

Quote by Bill Murray 

It all began just before lunch on a Saturday, my son who is three asked me if we could look in the fridge and see what was in there. I asked him if he wanted lunch and casually asked him what he wanted. 

As the fridge door swang open he asked for a cheese sandwhich (a classic fav for my little monster) and then his eyes spied the squirty cream hanging in the door compartment, confidentially he said ‘ a cheese sandwhich with squirty cream on top please mummy’ my reaction was simple. No

  • As he began to whine and I walked a way I thought, why can’t he? Why did I ask him if I wasn’t going to listen to him? How unempowering as a mother is that? I felt sad and instantly grabbed the fridge door, took out the wholemeal bread, cheese and squirty cream; his face lit up and so did my soul. 


(I couldn’t actually bring myself to squirt the cream ‘on top’ but he was happy and ate every bite) 

My little miracle son, who has been on this planet for just over three years empowered me. I spend my life telling him and my students at school that they can do what they like, that limitation is a state of mind and to dream big. In articles like Tigers I hopefully inspire you all to do the same. 

Now before ‘nutritional experts / haters’ or may be even angry lacto intolerant people comment on what I gave my son today, negativity is not welcome here. My  monster can eat for England, has a fabulous varied diet and had all of his 5 a day by 10am this morning. He isn’t under or over weight and to be honest every now and then I may let him assemble his own creations from now on. It didn’t do Heston Blumenthal any harm in his career and this was more about choices and creativity than nutrition – although I’m thinking his calcium intake for today is taken care of, right?

To my little rascal, a huge thank you for giving me a sense of empowerment and here’s to occasionally letting you take the culinary reigns, even if the menu may resemble Letitia Cropley’s (old lady in the Vicar of Dibley) taste palette. 

Stay empowered and listen to your inner tuition, it’s very rarely wrong. 


Integrity…

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

Quote by the talented C S Lewis

When I was a little princess I wasn’t very good at playing hide and seek. This is a big deal as an infant – I hated the tension of waiting to be found and I was even worse and knowing across the playground were people hiding from me.I avoided tension at all costs and as a result am an adult that still can’t do films with ‘jaws’ affiliated music, any sort of ghost house or theme park ride where people may jump out. The other thing that I have is a huge conscience – I’m just under 5ft but my conscience is easily 7ft. The great thing is that it is with me even when people aren’t watching. At work I can’t walk past litter without popping it in a bin, if the corridors are empty and I’m in a hurry and walk past a piece of litter I can literally hear it calling me, I usually walk back to pick it up and I guess the two allow integrity to blossom in my world. Integrity is far deeper than litter, but I think it’s the small moments of acting ‘morally’ whether people are watching or not. I use morally lightly as this is subjective to personal interpretation. 

It’s amazing how much our primary socialisation impacts us as adults. I’m not sure you can build on integrity if it’s not there? (Although you can build on any aspect of your life that you aren’t happy with) Integrity is the foundations of your soul, the cement of your thoughts and the dial to your moral compass.

If you constantly worry about what people think and only act in a positive manner because they are watching – you’ve forgotten your foundations and perhaps your dial may need ammending. Worst still is acting in a poor manner because others are watching and you think they’d approve.

Spend time this week thinking about your core morals and never shift from these beliefs. It may be helpful to jot them down. Integrity is the essence of you, and if you can’t do you then you’ve lost the best asset that you will ever have. I told you C S Lewis was a clever chap.

Collect moments #3yrs

~ Fridgesays ~ 1 Comment

Quote by Aarti Khurana.

Before you think I’m going to waffle on about cleaning out the cupboard that no one dare open for fear of death (or in my case suffocation of thousand of carrier bags cascading out), I’m not. 

Instead I’m going to focus on an idea I’ve seen across the net for your little ones. In essence you ask them 20 questions and record the answers every year. I’m using my blog but you can use your Facebook page, a note book or even the notes section in your phone. I may actually do the note book too, as I like the idea of having a scrap book with the questions all together to look back on; you could include pictures and maybe even handwritten responses as they get older.

Simple but so blooming gorgoeus. J loved being asked and it’s definetly something you’ll see here annually. Enjoy and why not give it a go yourself. As I was doing it I wondered (with an adjustment to the questions) how an adult version may be just as inciteful

1. What’s your favourite colour? Green 

2. What’s your favourite toy?    Ohhh my cars 

3. What’s your favourite fruit?   Blueberries (really? Stop eating all the bananas in the house then)

4. What do you like to watch on TV? CBeebies, Rah Rah.

5. What do you like to eat at lunch? Cheese sandwich 

7. What item of clothing do you most like to wear? My crocodile t-shirt 

8. What game do you like to play? The owl game (a phonic game he recently got from ELC)

9. What’s your favourite animal? A crocodile.

10.  What song do you most like? Miss Polly had a dolly and Up town funk (haha eclectic taste)

11. What’s your favourite snack? Coss-ants (croissant are eaten in huge quantities every weekend) 

12. Favourite story book? Billy Goats Gruff

13. Who’s your best friend? Thomas (from Nursery)

14. What’s your favourite sport? Rugby (Daddy may of encouraged this answer)

15. Which holiday do you like the best? Christmas 

16. What do you sleep with? Muzzy (Muslin) and my pillow (he has forgotten the toy box he usually sleeps with) 

17. What do you like best for breakfast? Jam and porridge with jam…just jam.

18. What do you like to do outside? Play 

19. What’s your favourite drink? Pineapple Juice

20. What’s your favourite dinner? Pizza,ooohh pizza can we have pizza? (No) *sulks complete with bottom lip

Until next year, thanks for reading. Please share any that you do, as I genuinely would love to read them.