Many quotes, books and wisdom suggests that humans are just like plants…just more complex around the edges, but we still need water, sunlight and soil, or in the human case – a good foundation that’s fertile.

Often areas of our lives can become stagnant and we’re unsure why we are not thriving. This reminded me of an assembly I did years ago and I thought I’d share the story here.

If you go into a restaurant you can order what’s on the menu. What you can’t do is order pasta at McDonalds or burgers in a curry house. It’s not that you are asking for too much, it’s just in that environment those things don’t exist. In some work places you may be asking for pasta when they serve burgers, in some relationships you may be wondering why your partner is talking about pizza when you’ve believe they should serve salads.

In case I’ve distracted this post with too many food analogies and you are reading this hungry let me cut to the chase. Sometimes we ask our friends to support us and they don’t have capacity, we ask our partners to be romantic and they aren’t wired that way – what we receive (if anything) is an inauthentic experience that feels false and doesn’t meet your needs. You aren’t asking for too much, you are not too much and you are not the problem – the relationship is.

Just like indoor plants, we can out grow our pots. If you find yourself doubting yourself, it might not be you. It might be that your roots have grown and it’s time to expand your horizons.