quotes to inspire

You are not weak for needing time to sort through this

~ Fridgesays ~ 23 Comments

Quote from MHN

Currently I’m in a whirlwind of festive get togethers, chores and life’s demands. December brings joy but also preparation. As regular readers will know I also go HUGE on intentions and goals, as we step into 2019 my bucket list flows with plans, ideas and steps towards making my dreams come true.

The carousel of life, even in the most joyful times can sometimes need a pause. As a park ride, the carousel has always been a favourite of mine. Usually in the centre of the action, the glistening fairy lights and twinkling music draws my inner child in like a warm hug. However, I wouldn’t want to stay on a carousel for a long period of time. Life’s issue – even joyful moments are often served quick and unexpected. The joy is in a moment and a moment should never last a life time.

You are not weak or selfish for needing time to sort through an issue that’s present in your life. Often as humans, much like a carousel we are presented with an issue, or view of the world, think we’ve dealt with it, only to see the pattern emerge in another aspect of our life.

I urge you to create time to reassess your journey. To jump off of the carousel and spend time sorting through the issue. Life is best with variation and the carousel isn’t going anywhere, so take a ride on the Big Dipper, you never know what you’re missing.

No.

~ Fridgesays ~ 25 Comments

To quote Hamlet, act 3, scene 3, line 87

We are on the cusp of a consumer crazy season. Of crackers with plastic and wrappings that nobody wants, that are often abandoned on the table long after the plates have been clearer away. Perhaps of saying thank you for gifts that lack thoughts, need or joy.

I know this post isn’t my usual sparkly positive self. Don’t despair, I’m about to flip it around but before I do I want to empower you with the word No. (As a Teacher and a Mum I feel Hamlet needs to add the words ‘thank you’ after his quote). Balance in life is crucial for physical and mental wellbeing. I’ve written many posts about ‘yes’ – to opportunities, change and adventure that so many of us hide from in daily life. I’m a fan honestly.

However, December seems to bring excess and anxiety for things we don’t want to do.

If you feel at all doubtful, listen to your instinct and say No.

  • Say No to buying gifts for that awkward Aunt or Uncle that you feel obliged to because they buy for you. It only takes a quick awkward phone call to release everyone of this burden for many Christmas’s to come
  • You don’t need to eat everything you’re offered
  • you can say no to sprouts.
  • You don’t need to attend that party that makes you feel anxious.
  • You don’t have to wear anything you don’t want to. I am the proud owner of zero Christmas jumpers.
  • Christmas doesn’t mean ‘spend money you don’t have’ say No.

Make sure the traditions you and your family participate in bring joy, love and a sense of fun…not awkward social events. Don’t become one of the three kings that bought guilt, anxiety and fear. Many of the innkeepers said No and it led to a way cooler version of Christmas. Baby Jesus born in a stable gathered by animals is all the better for its simplicity.

Saying No doesn’t need to be negative, it’s in fact a tool that can bring a huge amount of joy and relief. Balance is where joy and happiness can be fully embraced. This holiday season say yes to things that make you warm and smile, politely decline things your instinct tells you will add stress, keep the holiday season simple and stay present in all you do. It’s a recipe for the perfect Christmas.

Wake. Pray. Slay

~ Fridgesays ~ 8 Comments

Quote by awesome Anon

I find that if I can wake on my terms (without a little ninja creeping in and tackling me) I can literally take on the world.

Seriously it’s like a revolutionary universal explosion, when the ninja does creep in my day is more like the Jurassic age…mummy dinosaur is ferocious. I’ve wrote a post before about my morning routine but thought I’d write about how I turn my Mummy-Rex in to a mummy dream when things don’t go as planned.

I lock myself in the toilet. We are blessed with both an upstairs and downstairs bathroom, so if one is out of action nobody has the excuse to break down the door. I basically sit and reawaken. It’s not as snug as my bed, but it’s ninja attack free. I then do some simple breathing techniques that I find work for me. I’ve also been known to do these in public bathrooms when my stress levels are going crazy. It’s called the OM breath and just two minutes is enough to reduce your heart rate by two thirds. I also like it because as you breath in and out you make a rasping sound that reminds me of waves. Google it, it works and the tutorials are hilarious.

I write a list. Seriously, I’m a spiritual being but have never found joy in prayer, but a list is like fuel in my engine. It gives me direction in an otherwise chaotic day, I feel a huge sense of achievement as I tick off each item. I’ve even been known to add things I’ve done previously to writing the list, on the list, just so I can tick them off. I even have a notebook dedicated to lists.

Self care indulgence. Everyday I squeeze in a little self care, it might be painting my nails, lighting candles, clearing out a draw, ringing a friend…but on days when I’ve turned it around I reward myself with bonus time. Today was indeed a slay day. There was so much to do and I was a single parent with the Mr away, so once the ninja was asleep I had a bubble bath, hair treatment, painted my nails, lit candles, listened to a podcast, had some posh tea and even made time (thanks to the tribe of support) to squeeze in a yoga class.

…why? Because when you’ve slayed you need to do two things.

  • Celebrate: because whatever you were slaying was exhausting.
  • Top up your cup: there’s that wise old saying that you can’t pour from an empty cup and frankly my cup was cracking today, nobody wants me to leak over them so best I fill in the chip and recharge.

I hope you wake to slay tomorrow. How do you turn things around when your day isn’t going as planned? Please share any tips in the comment section 🙂

Worry means you suffer twice

~ Fridgesays ~ 19 Comments

Quote by Newt Scamander.

  • Warning, I’m doing that thing again where the need to write pulls me out of my bed (even with freshly laundered sheets) and on to the floor in the office at the back of the house with the glow of my Macbook for company and a beauty salt lamp by my side. (desks have always felt a little too formal for me and I’m grounded on the floor; even if its a little draughty), so please forgive me if what I write is waffle.

I often write on the topic of happiness, perspective or self care. There is usually a silver lining or positive perspective to sparkle up this corner of the internet and worry isn’t my friend. I don’t invite him/her to my celebrations, neither does she/he make my Christmas card list (frankly, since having a child and working full time anyone who receives a card from me is truly blessed). I avoid negative people, conversations and situations. We don’t watch TV in our home, the news (web or paper version) are non existent. Yet still I am totally aware that the world we are part of is out of control. That plastic consumption is ridiculous and that banning plastic straws has probably come a little late in the day. That power, money and fear are still the driving forces. That scare mongering, praying on the vulnerable, greed and selfishness are growing much like plastic straws on our oceans seabeds, that stress is increasing, that happiness is often ‘sold’ in a misguided manner… I know this. It shakes my bubble that I work hard to create hard every now and then, its sucks the sparkle and actually at times has taken my breath with it.

Worry is the new fear (I’m not sure how new is new). We worry about worrying in between moments of ‘what if’s’ and ‘could’ ‘should’s’… the list is long. In education bullying is old hat, self diagnosis of anxiety and depression are on the increase amongst our children, as a species we are lost and drown our sorrows with drugs and alcohol (usually through those blooming plastic straws) and what I guess woke me from my comfy bed is a request, to ask you too to build a bubble, a cocoon of kindness and self care, to not engage with the negativity described above. Contrast is necessary for us to thrive, I can’t promise you can fully cut it out. Think of my request as a new detox regime – no fancy products needed, no 90 day money back guarantee required, in fact it won’t cost a penny. I’m asking because worry can be such a positive tool – it lets you know when you’ve lost balance, it reminds you that you care…but never give it the power to allow you to suffer twice.

If you can’t do this, then please at least stop using plastic straws.

Everything is figureoutable

~ Fridgesays ~ 26 Comments

Quote Anon.

I know these aren’t real words, but so much of my vocabulary that I use is created in my head, this spoke to me.

When I was younger I really felt that once you became an adult you had the world worked out, the pathways would open like some sort of ‘open sesame’ then on you plodded. Well either I wasn’t listening when they were handing out maps (highly likely) or the routes of life are more unknown than I had thought.

Problems, often cascade from no where. They arrive on my doorstep in envelopes of large bills that I wasn’t expecting, a car can collide into my rear and phone calls and more letters are required. The health of loved ones can be shared in a text or conversation and then hospital visits and worry ensues… or you can breath.

I know, breathing doesn’t actually pay the bill or fix a car, but it does allow your brain to process the issue from a grounded place rather than in a state of emotional turmoil.

Often when I’m faced with an issue that I can’t figure out how to solve, changing the activity I’m doing or distracting my brain with something I enjoy often means I come to a conclusion far quicker.

It sounds crazy, I realise to say ‘don’t think about the problem you can’t stop thinking about’ but honesty it works. My dear friend couldn’t conceive, her partner and her stopped trying whilst they saved for IVF…with the pressure removed she conceived and gave birth to a health bundle of new born.

When you ‘let go’ of tension magic happens; money flows from places you didn’t know existed, friends help out in ways you didn’t know they could…issues that you just couldn’t work out become figureoutable.

It’s not exactly a map to adulthood, but it is a magical step on a smoother pathway. Enjoy the journey and remember all problems are generally solved eventually, if you lack confidence then give this a read because You can, end of story

Beauty is an attitude

~ Fridgesays ~ 23 Comments

Quote by Estée Lauder

Boom! This quote is everything. For those of you born with a disadvantaged face, that thinks they need to be something that they aren’t, that believes beauty is physical – it’s a good day. You need two things to be beautiful and neither are related to HOW you look.

I hate to double quote but Roald Dahl gives us an insight into beauty with gem from the classic children’s book The Twits:

“A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts they will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”

You see kind thoughts create our reality and as I’ve discussed in so many of my posts, when you come from a place of good basic maths tells us that good things can be the only outcome, so rule one is think good thoughts and don’t forget this means thinking kindly internally about yourself and your capabilities.

So now the thoughts are flowing in a state of positivity, it’s time to put the coat of attitude on. Many jump for the obvious option – arrogance, but that often becomes ugly quickly and comes from your ego. That said, it can be breathtakingly beautiful (its usually the images you see on the front of magazines). I would encourage you to select my personal favourite; the transparent sparkly rain Mack. Basically how this item works is you are you – it’s transparent so everyone can see you. The sparkles are the bits you want to show off, extend those eyelashes with your favourite mascara, wear a top that makes you feel fabulous, style your hair in a way that makes you magical; that’s your sparkle. Then own that Mack, write your name in it. Invest in it and of course look after it. Hold your head high and I promise you will feel beautiful. This in turn will magnetise you to lovely people, wonderful experiences and genuine compliments. Beauty is an attitude, not a physical state.

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What you allow is what will continue

~ Fridgesays ~ 43 Comments

Quote from the wise but absent named ‘Anon’

This quote is accountable.

This quote reminds me that I am responsible for my own life, decisions, health and overall well being. For this reason, this quote gets stuck in my throat slightly. I honestly believed growing up that adults knew everything, had all the answers and had their lives all mapped out. Ummm… how wrong was I? Every day I am winging it, some days more than others, there are goals but how we arrive at our destination alters weekly, I lose track of intentions, frankly I often forget what I’m saying half way through a conversation. The adult world is tough and if I’m honest I feel like Barbie made it look so easy. Her and Ken used to get married weekly in my bedroom, often went on holidays, she wore big dresses to big parties, drove a sports car…Barbie never worried about the washing basket over flowing, never argued with Ken about council tax payments, she never doubted an outfit change, or worried how she would fit the school run in between her career as a ski instructor.

Perhaps we should be more Barbie. Enjoy the moment, live for the now. I think if Barbie could see this quote she would fully embrace it.

This weekend we watched Deadpool 2, in it are various super hero’s with crazy mutant powers and my favourite is Domino. Not just because her name reminds me of a popular pizza chain, but because her super power is luck. She has more self belief than a religious denomination, she is seriously cool. As I was watching her fly through the air and land on a giant inflatable panda…yup thats a real scene from the film, I was captured by her vocabulary. She was so kick ass confident and assertive I couldn’t help but notice that she had high standards and didn’t falter.

Aspects of our lives are often out of our control, but there are elements that we can do something about. Setting standards for how we will be treated and how we will let others treat us is a huge issue for many. Its probably worth grabbing a pen and paper at this point and writing down things you’re not happy with. Do you need to book something fabulous to do with a friend or partner because you never get to see them, do you need to set an hour aside with a giant box and clear that cluttered cupboard that frustrates you every time you attempt to open the draw and the contents cascade out. Do you need to speak to a work colleague or perhaps you need to reprioritise yourself on your ever growing ‘to do’ list.

Often in films the main characters are faced with huge challenges (with Marvel its always saving the world with some kind of time issue) but perhaps what we might miss is that they also take on those challenges and make sacrifices or changes to live happy ever after. Just because you allowed it last week, doesn’t mean you have to this week, just because its always been that way, doesn’t mean that has to continue. Life is often short, precious and wasted, seize this quote and make your life accountable you may just end up with a better quality of life, or at worst finally get that cupboard organised.

Start your day with a dance party

~ Fridgesays ~ 28 Comments

Quote Anon wearing sparkly shoes

I have a morning routine that I do before my day begins, you can read about it here. If you do nothing for yourself ever again, I suggest you get one too. It makes my day start from a place of joy and if I didn’t have it in my life it would be like not having lungs.

After this the days demands capture me, throw me into a frenzy and at times I have to regain control with a mini mindful exercise. I think the ‘your day’ in this quote is really important, we can blame others when they interrupt our flow, make excuses but really it’s how we deal with life’s negatives and how long we hold on to them that guides our lives.

Emotions are complex, the extremes are often lifted for me with a dance to a song that makes me smile. I crank it up and dance like I’m on stage in a huge concert hall. The boys run for cover – this mummy can’t sing BUT THAT DOESN’T STOP ME. I find night club classics from my clubbing days are a great way to begin, then I move on to anthems. The concert in my bedroom, lounge or kitchen goes on until I’m ready to take on the world…which reminds me The Guardians of the Galaxy sounds tracks are also amazing for mood shifting.

Sometimes I listen through headphones for a personal party effect but mainly I like to contaminate the house with my moves and boom the music as loud as it can go. I’ve also been known to find a musical soundtrack on Spotify and work my way through the numbers…always with random lines from various characters delivered in perfect time. My son sometimes comes in for a strut, but mainly I’m a solo act.

Why? Well I do have a drama degree, but I actually think I dance because physically moving helps those endorphins to buzz around, lifts the soul, its free and guess what – it works.

If you have never danced in the mirror, thrown yourself down the stairs like a Hollywood diva in the last few weeks then I have one piece of advice. Do it. Dancing isn’t for those that can, Shakira was right – the hips don’t lie. Kelis finds milk shades and boys in her yard, BeyoncĂ© runs the world and Tina Turner is simply the best and looking great on each and every roll down the river. So what are you waiting for? Solo dance through the week and watch the changes that happen to your mood, body and vibration.

The difference between pizza and your opinion is I only asked for pizza.

~ Fridgesays ~ 14 Comments

Quote from Anon

This corner of the web is my place to share opinions, beliefs and ideas. I share them for my own sanity and hope that you the reader are inspired, motivated or are able to take away a glimmer of hope. It’s your choice to click the site, to read and I’m glad that you do. You don’t have to – unless you’re my parents, in which case you are bound by the supportive nature of the role.

Let’s discuss pizza for a moment. The strong carbohydrate base that supports all of the goodness above it, the foundation of all great decisions. The melted cheese that’s brings joy to the palette, the tomato sauce that clearly knows its place – hidden under the joyful melted cheese…then any toppings that YOU choose. Heaven. Pizza even caters for diversity. From the controversial pineapple to the slimy mushroom (yup not a fan) you create a pizza topping bonanza that reflects your mood and taste.

I personally love pizza when it’s served so hot in burns the inside of your mouth or cold the next day from the fridge. You can eat it at lunch, dinner, snack or the cold breakfast option.

You see pizza like life isn’t simple, it comes with variables, it’s personal and it very often doesn’t disappoint. Until you’re just about to take a bite and someone passes comment.

“Urghhh why’ve you got sweet corn on it?”

” I don’t eat pizza I’m gluten conscious, vegan, lacto – licious”

Or the worst…

“I love pizza, can I try a slice of yours?”

WHAT?

You see much like the quote, I ordered pizza. I asked for sweet corn, I asked for a deep pan, I vocally made a vowel whispered between myself and the waitress of what I wanted. Like life, I will make decisions that I’ll regret (in this case sweet corn) or decisions to avoid things I’m not okay with (stuffed crusts or any testicle derivative claiming to be a meat feast) but I didn’t ask you.

I have NEVER bitten in to a slice of pizza and asked for an opinion to be made, frankly silence and pizza are a great combination.

So when I walk in a room much like pizza, if I haven’t asked for your opinion on my outfit, don’t give it. If a new parent looks exhausted they don’t need you to tell them, this became extremely apparent at 2am, 3am and 4am. If a pregnant woman waddles in she doesn’t need to hear how big she looks or be told she is about to pop. Opinions are best projected when ordering your own pizza.

If however you don’t like pizza (???) and opinions are over flowing from you. Here are three things you can do:

  • Join a pressure group or political party
  • Create your own domain / blog or YouTube channel
  • Stick the pizza in your mouth anyway