Anon

Be a good person but don’t waste time proving it.

~ Fridgesays ~ 24 Comments

Quote Anon.

The word that sprung to mind was ‘integrity’ when I saw this quote. It’s so important when you have an audience to still do the same things when your audience has gone home.

Being ‘good’ is obviously a word thats open to interpretation, but proving it is something I find people who are often insecure in their self do. Lets face it many people suffer from ‘lack of self love love’ and we certainly all have days where the self love monster eats our souls and spits us out in a top thats too tight, eyeliner thats clearly thicker on one side than the other – and thats only if we can be bothered to open our make up boxes.

Self love aside, there is nothing worse than meeting a person, thinking they are ‘good’ (feel free to enter any other adjective of your choice in here – I’m partial to ‘kind’ and also ‘stupendous’, although I just looked up good in the thesaurus and ‘ship shape’ made me laugh), only to find a few meet ups down the line that they are more plastic than Tiny Tears.

However, don’t despair below I plan to outline my own survival guide of 2018 for surviving and even thriving around these people. Its a comprehensive guide and I hope will be of value to you and others, in true fridgesays manner I have created it in magnets.

In essence, if someone is good to you or others to impress you or so you think they are good, suck up their good vibes like a baby and their milk bottle and don’t worry about their motivations. If they are doing it to impress you, firstly be honoured they give a shizzle and then know that in time people always show their true colours. I believe Phil Collins (legend of the 90’s) created a song around this theme, aptly named ‘True colours” although I can’t recommend the song to you, the video is hilarious with more fist pumps than the average 90s classic.

If you are an ‘impress’ kind of person, take a moment to sit down. Think about your motivations – if you want to bake a cake for people or show kindness and compassion, do it…if you feel socially bound, don’t. I live in a village and my son attends the local school, some of the parents are lets say a little keen to get involved. I am not. If its in my sons interest, I’m there. If its not or of no interest to me, I’ll avoid it like I do day time TV. I couldn’t give a scooby doo what any of the other parents thinks of me…why? because I don’t have the luxury of time to think about them and when I do have time, I’d rather show kindness to those in my tribe. I don’t aspire to be the class ‘rep’ Mum and I don’t wish to meet up with them in the holidays, unless my sons wants to see his friends.

I do think good role modelling is essential to our little peoples lives, and so try to be the best me. This summer I am planning a series of ‘acts of kindness’ to others beyond and within our tribe to educate my son on being grateful for what we have, sharing and giving to those that don’t.

So please, if you are anxious about what others think of you, spend the energy of loving you a little more and I promise what others think will become irrelevant.

Ssshhh I’m hiding from negative people

~ Fridgesays ~ 24 Comments

Quote Anon

This quote/ phrase made me smile. However, there is good news if you too are in hiding. You do not need to hide. Which is great as the media distributes negativity like Cath Kidson prints flowers, the majority of the world are moaning and if like me you try and keep your vibration up it can feel like the universe in colluding against you.

I am a ninja of positivity and a black belt in keeping my vibration high, why? My soul mate is a miserable git. This means I live with the dark side and over the years I’ve learnt all the tricks. Below I’m going to spread the love on how to remain positive when faced with doom (also known as ‘living with Mr F – a survival guide’).

  • Energy is attracted to like, so if you can spend time with like minded peeps – do so. I always avoid large meeting spaces like the staffroom, or children’s soft play – seriously stressful places.
  • When Mr F is downstairs in a grump, I move myself upstairs or to another room, I drown his noise out with music that’s upbeat
  • Change the subject. If you’re in a good enough vibration to hear that the person you’re talking to is being negative change the subject. If you can’t close that conversation down and get away. (See previous bullet point)
  • Sometimes I laugh at Mr F, probably not the best advice but it raises my vibration and is a clear message to him that he is grumpy.
  • I make time in the morning to work on me, before the world and Mr F grunts. This means I’ve already established my pattern and I’m flying high. (Things you can do to achieve this include meditate, listen to your thoughts, set intentions, establish a good morning routine, listen to a positive podcast)
  • I end the day how I want. I don’t follow Mr F to bed when he is tired. I might stay downstairs or do my own thing. If I do follow him it ends up in a squabble.
  • I keep busy – feeling accomplished helps me to vibrate higher.
  • If a crack of a smile should enter Mr Fs face I celebrate it. AKA enjoy it whilst it lasts.

How do you stay smiling when the world outside is grey?

I like my music so loud I can’t hear my thoughts

~ Fridgesays ~ 37 Comments

Quote Anon.

We are a musical family. My record player is blasting from the kitchen, in the car the base is always turned up and even in bed I often hit Spotify for some relaxing melodies to drift me off to the land of nod, bath music is often classical and did I mention music in the garden too. However, one thing is true – I adore my music turned up loud.

My personal music collection is eclectic and I tend to pick a different genre depending on the time of day, mood I’m in or mood I wish to create.

There is also a power in the silent moment of life which id like to acknowledge and have previously written about. However, when my mind is overloaded with lists of things to do, or if I’m building myself up for the day ahead – I often quieten my brain with my music turned up LOUD. I am totally a karaoke car Queen. I also thankful to Bluetooth, which means people now think I’m on the phone rather than giving myself a pep talk, raving, jiving or am a pop princess. Sometimes I make up lyrics to classical pieces (warning this is a simple way to destroy the power of Mozart in seconds), however if you often get anxious, are an over thinker or generally find your brain a hard place to be then music can be a pleasant vacation; you also don’t need to prebook via a travel agent, it’s often free and jet lag never occurs. In my opinion the louder the better helps to push away the outside distractions and internal frustrations.

How do you use music to control your emotions?

Never be a prisoner of your past, it was just a lesson not a life sentence

~ Fridgesays ~ 32 Comments

I’m not sure who this quote is by, but it seems to have a Hindu / Urdu meaning and this just makes it even cooler for me. 

We blame ourselves for past behaviours, but actually no matter how poorly we behaved, we did it in the moment with little thought of the repercussions. Many of the things we do as humans are often unkind (seriously take a look at the rate we are destroying planet earth) and yet we are also unaware of the how our behaviour both positive and negative can have on others. I once saw a girl in my school and asked if she was ok. I wasn’t particularly worried about her, but she didn’t look herself, it was a thirty second conversation. Several days later I found out through her form tutor that she had opened up about our brief conversation, until I had noticed she had felt totally unloved and disregarded…this time my words healed. I had no idea. 

I also can remember a time I allowed a man in my life to make me feel small, insignificant and he totally discounted my feelings and my heart. Luckily I later realised he wasn’t worthy of my time, love or energy. Sadly, he was probably reflecting his own faults on me and I allowed this. He had no idea. 

What’s my point? It’s that we totally underestimate the power of words, actions and our daily vibrations that we put out to the world, not just negative but also positive. We harber events in our lives and hold on to them for too long. Turning our minds in to lost property boxes full of ‘could have, should have’ regrets and empty promises. 

Life really is a journey and one that we are so blessed to take. Some of us experience horrendous things that others couldn’t imagine…but that doesn’t make us hideous, it was just events of that moment in time, lessons not life sentences.So how do we stop this cycle of hurt? unlike a prison sentence we learn from them.

  •  I will never let a man or woman make me feel anything other than fabulous. 
  • I will never underestimate the power of asking someone if they are ok 
  • I will always take the time to listen to their responses – this is living and inturn enhances our positive vibration. 

Each day as I work towards being kinder to my family and friends I also need to be kinder to me. Perhaps I didn’t react the way I’d liked in any given situation the day before, may be I wasn’t the best me I could be. This isn’t a life sentence. This is me and all I am required to do is live better each day and not repeat the same mistakes once I’ve recognised them, which sounds easier than actioned, So be kind to you today and let the past go, it might just be your ‘get out of jail free card’ to a better quality of life.  

There is beauty in simplicity 

~ Fridgesays ~ 28 Comments

Quote Anon.

A while a go I was nominated by my blogging bestie Hayley from Mission Mindfulness to share my five favourite things. The post link was originally started by Mumzilla and as I’m a huge fan of anything that can be linked to gratitude, I thought I’d give it a go. Except I’m not really a fan of ‘stuff’ if anything I’m trying to move the mindset of my twenties that shopping is life and stuff makes me feel good… 

What’s even weirder is upon reflection, I couldn’t think of five things? Now as many of you know shoes are a thing I do enjoy. They didn’t make my top five though because I would never want to pick a particular heel over another, each pair has an outfit or occasion which would make it number one (*As you can see I’ve still got some work on being materialist)

These are the things I have selected, in the background is…


1). My yoga mat and block 

Why? I love yoga and I’m secretly competitive with myself and enjoy the progress I’ve made. I indulge in one to one classes each week and it makes me feel amazing. It’s my time to be ME. I’m not mummy, teacher or any other demand, it’s just my body mind and mat coming together. If I’m honest it’s my therapy into the week ahead. 

2). Hashtag Amazing Mug 


One of my pupils bought this for me for no reason other than she saw it and thought of me. It was an unexpected gift of delight and imbedded my belief that teenagers are just as thoughtful as any other generation. I do say “hashtag amaze” all the time and so it’s also very me and appropriate. 

3). Crystals 


This piece is Stilbite and Apophyllite (technically two pieces intwinned together) and lives on my bedside table. It is known for being good for meditation and used to contact guardian angels. It can help anxiety and stress but mainly I adore the fusion of the two crystals and think it’s pretty beautiful. Mother Nature is an awesome power house. 

4). Candles by Neom 


Can you tell I’m a female in my thirties? This scent is perfect. I usually go for a light cotton linen scent in candles, this is just a little different, more indulgent and my absolute favourite. It’s usually reserved as a Christmas gift and it lasts for such a long time. It’s like heaven in my living room. 

5). Engagement ring 


I do love a sparkle and picked this myself from an amazing selection of jewellery shops in Barbados. The stones around the edge are diamonds and the centre stone is a type of Amethyst that’s comes from the region. It seems to alter its colours in the light. Mr F and I met, feel in love and got engaged on this wonderfully little island so it’s more than just a ring to me. We recently returned in 2016 for our sons first holiday and I don’t plan to stop ever returning. 

Isn’t it funny how simple the objects I’ve picked are? Perhaps humans aren’t so complex after all? (Who am I kidding) 

To keep the gratitude and reflection going I’ve selected three more bloggers. However, if you would like to take part please do. 

My nominations:

Alana from Burnished chaos

Jess from Prosecco Mum

Miss Anon from The Single Swan

Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles 

~ Fridgesays ~ 25 Comments

Anon, *although I like to think Mary Berry or Delia came up with this little gem.  

Cake and magic in one quote is always going to get my attention. Firstly, I believe I’m a cupcake. Of course I have muffin moments, but I believe there are great things to come with sprinkles on top. Every child I teach and especially my son – I want cupcakes for their lives, but more importantly I want them to have the inner hope that miracles happen and no matter how bleak today was, tomorrow will always be better.

It’s easy to be a muffin. To lack the sparkle and glitz of a cupcake. After all everyone knows sprinkles on cupcakes are compulsory. I’m also partial to a ratio of more icing than cake. 

Muffins are wholesome and I imagine (if they could) they would shop in sensible shops and alway have a cagoule or umberella in their bag just in case. Muffins are usually packed with something non-naughty like raisins, nuts, seeds and fruit and that’s okay. Seriously, my previous post was all about not judging and would be easy to slate and hate on the healthy muffin option, compared to the glitz and glam of the cupcake… but that’s not my style or what I think this quote is about. 

I think we all have muffin moments, especially when pregnant and just after (okay, years after for me), we eat well and get by, we rock the messy bun and frankly we get stuck in a rut of the same two outfits, the comfy cardigan or the pumps that are easy to slip on by the front door. It’s essential at this point that we don’t judge because easy access shoes are fab and with Autumn looming I’m all about a snuggly cardigan. I think this quote is about reminding us to not slip into a rut because we’ve forgot the ten thousands pairs of shoes hidden in our wardrobe, perhaps the hat with the cute logo or the over sized sunglasses that make you feel like a film star. It’s these moments when we become a cupcake. 

It’s probably not healthy to eat cupcake everyday, but life is too precious to be a muffin forever more. So this is a post to remind us to rock the shoes, wear the outfit that’s 100% impractical but 1000% fabulous…add the icing and enjoy the things that make you happy. As always from my fridge doors – dare to dream and go for it.

You gotta nourish to flourish 

~ Fridgesays ~ 41 Comments

Every now and then I see a quote and it lights my universe. 

At the moment I am planning kitchen renovations and I wouldn’t mind this little quote hanging somewhere? Food for thought (See what I did there)

Nourish according to the dictionary means ‘to provide food or the opportunities for people to grow and be in good condition’ 

If I’m honest when I see the word nourish I think of food, but what else do we need?

Self belief: if you can dream it, then you can make it happen. This is essential not just to be able to flourish but to be able to sustain any kind of growth (and that includes happiness) 

Drive and desire: these are easy to have and harder to actually make happen. Usually because they require us to get out of our comfort zone and perhaps even take a risk or two. I’ve found since becoming a parent that often the risk is scarier because of my son. However, surely the dream is always ultimately the better finish line for him to see me arrive at?

Tribe: a good family, neighbours, work colleagues and friends all help to make a little ‘you’ community. When the chips are down, don’t panic – team ‘you’ will be there like a giant pillow of love and comfort – looking around and it’s a bit sparse, no problem, sometimes the harder moments let us know which team members require demotion. 

Wellbeing: be it physical or mental you need to make your health number one. Balance is key to this; I’ve written thousands of posts on the issue so for more info read everything I’ve ever written, pretty much – give or take a gratitude post, oh…

Gratitude: a sprinkle of thanks and a piece of humble pie can not only make you a favourite amongst your tribe but you’ll find you manifest and receive even more than you thought possible…seriously Beyoncé and all the big divas are always thanking the people that surround them. 

P.s. Not such a big diva as Queen B but thanks for reading and I hope you leave a little more nourished. If not, what area do you need to step it up in? 

I don’t hold grudges, you just become irrelevant 

~ Fridgesays ~ 18 Comments

Quote by…the one and only Anon. 

This post is about how harsh and non emotional I can be. Since as long as I can remember I do not hold the ability to forgive, forget or even realise people that hurt me exist. I can cut emotions ties and literally forget that they ever were part of my world…or so I thought until I wrote this post.

I think it probably began with the girl at Nursery (aged 3) pinched me. I couldn’t be friends with her when she started my secondary school over ten years later. I didn’t forget. 

There was the ex boyfriend who I’ve watched treat every woman he has ever dated awfully. Over the years he has caused serious heart ache to many and perhaps once I held a grudge. Now, he is irrelevant and I pity his lack of ability to love honestly and truly. Time heals but in my case it seems to blur to the point I no longer care. 

Several years a go there was a murder of a young boy called Anthony Walker, the attack was racist and brutal. His mother publically forgave the murderers. It happened before I became a parent, but I knew she was sincere and inspirational. I knew I wouldn’t have the capacity to forgive as she had done. Gee Walker became my inspiration – I aspire to her sincerity and clarity of emotions. 

Forgiveness can release you from anger, illness and heightened negativity. Grudges only cause bitterness in those who hold it – not those it’s aimed at. So why is it so hard to forgive? 

I wish I had ‘the top ten ways’ to release anyone from negative emotions. I don’t. In truth it’s a battle I often come across in my own life. For me neutralising the emotion and making them irrelevant, like the quote suggests does help me to feel free of the negativity, but in truth I guess by making someone ‘irrelevant’ you care enough to put them in a ‘I don’t care’ category, which when I was smaller I distinctly remember being a hot air balloon, it was rammed with sarcastic teacher and kids who I didn’t like and the balloon was always a one way trip. Good bye! 

Whilst thinking about my own lack of forgiveness (seriously I can be harsh) the list of people who have made it to my ‘I don’t care’ list / hot air balloon ride is long and I know why each of them made it to my naughty list, which means I still hold a grudge…

Other inspirations for putting emotions aside is when parents separate and ‘for the sake of the kids’ (or their own sanity) stay on positive terms. Love is complex and broken hearts can be bitter and messy. It doesn’t surprise me that for your children couples often make it work in a platonic way, full credit due when this can be achieved, I know it’s not always an option. 

How do you deal with forgiveness and do you have any tips for others? …because I’m asking for a friend 😉 

Rock bottom has created more heroes than privilege

~ Fridgesays ~ 18 Comments

Quote by Anon.

Rock bottom is a place I have been within my own journey and not one id like to visit again any time soon. The great thing about us as individuals is that everybody’s rocks are at varied levels, like a metamorphic rock; some of us are granite and have experienced challenge following grief, others are more slate and have been homeless, broken hearted may be a layer of Anthracite and within the stages of rock making much like humans there are thousands of layers.

There is one huge positive about your individual layer of rock bottom…things can only get better. It may sound obvious and perhaps patronising but there is also a delight in knowing that however bad your today is, tomorrow will be better simply because it can’t get any worse. The real issue is seeing that in the bleak depths of rock bottom.

Gratitude is a way to raise your current reality. Appreciating what you do have, rather than wallowing in what you don’t is a hard but necessary step in raising your vibration (one thats easier said than done) when life throws you a new level of rock bottom you didn’t know existed.

I also have a huge amount of respect for individuals who are now considered great within our history books and came from rock bottom.

  • Oprah Winfrey came from poverty and is now the richest billionaire black woman of our times.
  • Celine Deon was the youngest of 14 children (ouch) and grew up with very little, she now is worth around $400 Million.
  • Jim Carrey when young was made homeless and his family lived in a van…he now makes $20 million per film and is well known for his upbeat and grateful vibes and of course his humour.
  • Jay Z grew up in poverty and around crime – he even shot his own brother aged 12. From crime came a hungry talent that values the rapper at around $550 million

Of course it isn’t always about money. Many people grew up without love and experience  fantastic relationships in their adult life or have rock bottoms that involve other ‘lacks’ and find them as they age.

Privilege however doesn’t seem to have the hunger to do well that poverty and a lacking nature can offer. There are many aristocratic families within the UK that achieve very little for their families wealth or persona. Not great news for the ‘Made in Chelsea’ crew; although none of them seem to be falling on hard times just yet.

However, I believe that the real essence of this quote is about hope. This little four letter word is crucial to anyone wishing to have a better tomorrow. Hope has fed thousands and continues to do so across the globe daily. Hope usually manifests itself in small amounts, much like a seed. It doesn’t require much to nourish it to the next level – a few drops of water and some sunlight and great things begin to happen. As a stalk appears abundance can expands and from one small seed with very little life can come a wonder of blossoms, beauty, nectar and nutrition.

So if you are at rock bottom, I offer you a seed of hope and with a few small actions or risks can come the motion towards a life you use to dream…plus its cold and wet at rock bottom, what have you got to lose?

Know your worth and then add tax 

~ Fridgesays ~ 40 Comments

Okay, so this quote from Anon is going straight into my top twenty of self love quotes! (Yes, that’s right people I used an exclaimation mark) 

I recently posted a YouTube post on my facebook wall from Kristina Kuzmic (link here because it’s well worth a look), I love her feisty vibe and so once you’ve taken a peep imagine I too am sitting in a bubble bath of joy with a glass in my hands as tall as the Eifle Tower. (* reality disclaimer: no drink, sat at the top of the stairs hiding from my family so I can write in peace) 

This YouTube clip combined with this quote makes me feel like Beyoncé on stage in her element. It’s absolutely crucial that as role models of the human race we all make ourselves number one. Why? Because this in turn allows us to serve others (loved ones and the odd  stranger who may need a helping hand) way better. When I’ve had some ‘me time’ I literally can take on the world. It allows me to gain a better perspective on the state of the universe and at the same time prevents me from starting arguments / world wars over how towels are folded, toilet seats left up and all those other household triggers. This in turn makes me easier and way more accommodating to live with. 

But there is a second bonus: my health is better as a result of indulging in myself. I’m emotionally stable (*kind of) and physically healthier. So how do I make time…I ask others to help me out. Whether that be an evenings child care / grandparent indulgence, or I ask Mr F to take over while I sit on the stairs and get this written. 

I also don’t priorities housework and chores over myself. I sometimes wake up earlier to do yoga, read or listen to a podcast when helping hands aren’t available, sometimes when I’m not too exhausted from work I stay up a little later. At other times I seize opportunities to walk the dog and leave the house… I promise whatever your situation if you prioritise you can always find five minutes, you could even start with three.

So, I have a few questions… 

  • Do you make time for yourself?
  • How do you make the time?
  • What do you do with the time?

I swear I’m 95 years old and I seem to choose a hot bubbly bath, time to read, time to write, to sit and drink a HOT cup of tea, some yoga or a sneaky GnT… so if my worth is time to write then surely the tax is a gin and tonic 🙂 stay happy and make yourself number one.