Quote by Mark Nepo.

Do you believe in soul mates? I do.

I also think there are people that are right for you at a certain point in time, but like all good sweaters you can grow out of them and at times they can stretch and look far better on someone else. I’ve had my fair share of sweaters and now I have found my soul mate. Unlike Prince Charming or the Disney ‘forever’ he isn’t always adoring, doesn’t ever notice when I’ve had my highlights done and leaves the dirty plates on the side rather than in the dishwasher. I guess if he was my perfectly fitted sweater upon reflection he can be a little itchy and I struggle to get my head through the neck hole at times. You see a soul mate doesn’t mean perfect fit. For me it’s someone who excepts me, loves me and allows me to grow and develop, in turn we do that together.

How I found him is a yummy story,  much like the quote and the cliche, I wasn’t looking. I was bored of relationships and wanted to date. I could write a book on some of the terribly dull dates I went on. I even drew a stick man of perfection to focus finding my Mr.Forever. Colour coded and labelled what I was seeking, from physical attributes to personality and even a couple of materialistic musts. Meanwhile he had been my friend for several years and I came home, called him and would share how the dates had been from Mr S not cutting the mustard, how unintelligent the man from the bank had been and how speed dating was defiantly not made for me (I speed drank to entertain myself let’s leave it at that).

More importantly when we spoke we discussed other things, he was just as busy as me and dating was a small aspect of my life. Traveling with friends, enjoying the London night life and making memories was at the centre of my world. I went to the gym, took yoga courses and despite my stick man of perfection, I was busy living and oblivious to the potential soul mate sweater by my side. I think this was the key, well there was more of a bunch of keys…

• I didn’t need someone to complete me, I was content in my own universe.
• However, I had my vision on what I required (a list of things all my ex’s weren’t) and I wasn’t prepared to settle or make do. Please never settle, or let friends do the same – life is too short to pretend.
• Much like the flower I was blossoming and that has a certain attraction. It attracts quality Bees or in my case, a rugged muscle physic an independent nature, a desire to travel and a level of spontaneity that means life is fun but that I don’t feel vulnerable…oh and he had air miles. 

I love hearing how couples have met, ours was in Barbados but I’ll save that for another day.

Whatever your current sweater situation, be it you have so many your drawers are brimming (see what I did there) or perhaps you threw out the jumper that made you miserable, gave it to charity and cut off all emotional ties…only to see it worn by a friend or perhaps it keeps returning with the kids every alternative weekend. Whatever your current relationship status, be it happy ever after or riding the waves together or even a single pringle attitude, remember to focus on you first, much like a single flower head, if its abundant in good nectar the best Bee will find it…but watch out for green flies.

Quote by Rex Hudler.Its 4pm on a Sunday afternoon and this quote reflects my current reality. On the precipice of a new week I became absorbed and overwhelmed with the lunches that needed packing, the shift patterns that required certain meals at certain times, meetings, child care and everything else in between…I felt blue and was just about to write my famous ‘endless to do’ list when a little fairy tapped me on the shoulder. She whispered in my ear – put the kettle on.

Not one to mess with fictional beings, I flicked the kettle and grabbed the nearest mug. “No” said the Fairy, and I knew in an instant she preferred to drink tea from a fine bone china cup. The tea was just the break I needed from being absorbed in to the drain of destruction.

For those of you that have never thought what being ‘drained’ meant, check out my quick google below

Quote from Danielle Laposte

Disclosure: this quote flows with ease, the reality of anxiety isn’t always as simple. I realise that but think there is merit in this quote, let me explain why…

Anxiety: prevalent in developed countries, the biggest form of mental health in the USA and consuming teenagers like a Bee to nectar. 

What can we do? Well it’s complex, anxiety is often simultaneous with depression and at times will require either medical treatment or a holistic approach to overcome. The good news is many people are naturally anxious and it can be a personality characteristic than something needing long term treatment, it’s this form that I think this quote is aimed at. Anxiety is one of the many rainbow of emotions we are meant to feel, like all spectrums of emotions they allow us to form strategies and live our lives with the least resistance. I work with and for many people who are anxious by nature. I think it’s often a way the human brain shows it cares and at times can go in to overdrive, after all if we didn’t care we wouldn’t worry. It’s in this case that a drop of gratitude and a balanced look at the situation can dilute anxiety. 

Anxiety doesn’t care who it strikes and when, it doesn’t prefer poor, rich or polka dot but it does frequent females more often. 

My interpretation of this quote is that if you come across someone who is suffering from the anxiety, sit them down (hyperventilating has a wonderful way of making people faint) calmly speak to them and use positive sentences of gratitude, love and reassurance where possible. It really can help and although may not be the solution, to me its basic mathematics; a negative can be overcome by a positive. I work with one girl who is now able to use key sentences of self love to manage what once were daily attacks.  

To everyone who has avoided anxiety, keep the gratitude flowing and those daily mantras of self love, worth and belief will serve you dearly. 

*if anxiety is being served to you on a plate that you’d rather not consume, see you GP and gain guidance from site such as Mind 

Quote by William A Donohue

Today I wanted some time to write, I booked Daddy to step in for a cheeky hour so that I could edit and do all those ‘concentrating’ bits without J pulling for my attention. Time to write was my goal – the method however turned out very different. J doesn’t nap anymore (*biggest parent sigh ever) and this morning we hit the shops for some new shoes for his ever growing feet, on the journey home a miracle occurred – J fell to snoozy sleep in the car. After your first week of being a parent the phrase ‘never wake a sleeping baby’ is sacred and should be treated with extra tip toe care – this 100% extends to toddlers. So, with this is mind I’m now sitting on our drive way, tanning my legs out of the car door, achieving my goal of writing and in the back of the car is my snug content little dude. This example is exactly what I think this quote is about.

My bestie and her boyfriend set three mini goals a day. The method of how they achieve them is fluid. It’s a winning formula that so many of us miss because ‘that’s not how we saw it in our heads’…whilst hesitating your objective can be easily lost.

If like me you’re slightly obsessed with lists then you too will know that ticking them off is satisfactory but how you reach them is immaterial to the satisfaction of the flick of the tick.

That’s not to say you should ever sacrifice your goal or dreams, no matter how big they are.If you’re house hunting for a three bedroom house in a particular area with a specific price range – that’s what you want. Don’t shift – stay stubborn. It’s nearly always worth a drop of patience for the things you really want in life, but as the quote suggests flexibility in the method may mean you actually purchase a four bedroom house for the price and in the location of your previous goal…who doesn’t want a little more space?

This week take things as fluid as you can, set goals from emptying the laundry basket to world domination but don’t worry or get caught up with the minor details about how you arrive at your destination, sometimes things work out much better the way you never intended, for example I now have tanned legs and another post written. (tick)

Quote from Trent Shelton, an American Football player and someone I’m a little envious of. Not for his skills on the field, God no; I wouldn’t have a clue what to do with those, it’s this quote.

Every now and then I read a quote and wish I’d thought of it. This is genius in simplicity and has a flawless execution.

In life we all have defining moments, experiences or levels of ability that can have a negative impact on us.

Or we can be a broken crayon; altered by the process but still a crayon of colour and delight. I guess how we handle the events or abilities is our decision and perhaps is more powerful than the event or ability itself.

When our little girl passed away just days after she was born, we became the new parents without the need to push a pram. We became people that had something horrendously negative happen to them that they could never have expected. The days following her death were hard to get through and seven years on I’m still envious of anyone who has a daughter by their side. Anniversaries are always uncomfortable and I’ve learnt that there will always be ‘firsts’ that we will all miss out on experiencing. But I am not the grieving parent you may think, I rarely write about her and am always positive about the experience. As my first born she made me a ‘Mummy’ if only for a short time. She taught me about compassion, the grieving process and what real friendship looked / felt like. The experience took my fuscia pink crayon and with my heart snapped it in two…but I still colour with it and I don’t feel the need to show everyone the contents of my pencil case. I refuse to be defined by one experience or labelled accordingly.

This September I gained a new pupil in school who is by societies need to categorise her ‘Autistic’, when talking to her Mum she spoke of *Daisys needs and *Daisys ways, like they were personality traits of hers rather than of Autism and it was in this moment that her crayon radiated from the box. Autism became irrelevant and just as it should *Daisy shone with her own likes/dislikes just like every other child in my classroom or crayon in the box. Call me sentimental but they just endeared me to her all the more.

The end of a relationship and the inevitable heart break that follows is another time in our lives where in that moment you feel distorted and even question the most basic of tasks. I remember finding it difficult to breath – which is crazy as looking back the best thing that ever happened to me was losing that brown pooh crayon of doom.

I guess we are all crayons, some with our labels peeled and others dented from the impact of life in the pencil case. At times we may get broken but remembering we all have the CHOICE to still colour the most vibrant of pictures is essential to our quality of life.

So to all my stubby ends, peeled peers and lost pooh brown crayons of doom – life beyond the brand new box goes on, make your picture extra radiant and fill the page each and everyday using both your positive and negative experiences for the better.

If you was a crayon what colour would you be? Id be a limited edition glitter pink creation called something wonderful like ‘Flamingo fever’
*Daisys name was altered to protect her identity. 

Quote Anon
Reading my posts you can probably tell I’m an upbeat woman who can solve most things with a pair of high heels (the higher the better) and a swipe from a lipgloss wand, incidentally I love the quiet popping noise when you pull the gloss wand from its container…I digress, however, you’ll also know I’m a natural motivator and am hugely competitive with myself. If I can better my health, wealth, relationships, career or purchase a product that can do the job more efficiently I’m first in line. I don’t really have dreams – I have goals. Driving those goals to the finish line requires daily hard work, dedication and surrounding myself with like minded people

And that’s where it gets hard. Society is sooo hard on itself. I am enough right now. That doesn’t mean I can’t improve, it just means I love myself enough to give myself a break. It means I aspire to be more but still love where I am – and I know I’m lucky to feel this way because interacting with work colleagues, friends and family it seems self hate has become the norm. Lunch in the staffroom always involves someone commenting on their own eating habits, weight or the current diet trend. It’s exhausting.

It’s a poison that is slowly contaminating our wonderful children, sadly they grow up and somewhere along the line they lose their inhibitions, judge themselves with dark lenses as the rose tinted, happy go lucky attitudes of early years fall to the floor. Cracked and fragmented, disjointed and doubtful if what they can achieve.

Its the daily doubt that so many people who I see positive qualities in don’t recognise within themselves.

I guess what I’d like to say is, if someone else can love you how you are right now – you can love yourself too. In this very moment. For some this is hard, others it seems impossible. So how can you alter your self love dial to full on?

 I’m a great advocate of Lousie Hayes ‘Mirror work’ a quick surf through the web will give you detailed instructions, but in essence you begin by looking in the mirror and telling yourself that you love you. 

At first I can guarantee it’s totally cringe worthy and at times you laugh or someone else in the house thinks you are taking to them (awkward) but after a while it feels empowering and is rather addictive. 

You can extend this by telling yourself what you love or are grateful for. You may hate your belly but do you love your boobs? If so, look in the mirror and let your chest know. It’s working practice but I promise it’s worth it.

If the mirror seems too much to begin with you can simplify it by playing a little game. 

Every time I say something negative (my thighs are too large) I then say in my head something that I like (my eyes are beautiful) and over time you’ll find you don’t need to verbalise the negatives and as a result they reduce and self appreciation can prosper

A variation of this is to list the things you like, are grateful for and enjoy. 

However you feel about you in the moment please know that you are enough. That someone loves you just how you are. That if you have young children -you are a superhero that can do no wrong, and that the belly you hate is what they love to hold most.

You are enough. 

If you only have one mantra this should be it. 

Quote from the classic bear that no babies nursery is complete without  – Winnie the Pooh 

Do you like to nap? Are you someone who likes to lay in at the weekend, go to bed early or just loves a snooze? 

Or are you the opposite? Someone who feels napping is lazy, sleep is for the weak and you could be doing something productive? I know many babies and young children that agree with the latter. The average parent loses 400 – 750 hours of sleep in the first year after having a baby. 

We know and certainly research suggests that napping is good for us. The optimum power nap for adults should be between 15-30 minutes.

Sleep or lack of, is a fascinating area of research that so many of us are too busy to read up on. Perhaps reading this you’re thinking ‘it would be lovely if I had the time’ and I hope reading those thoughts you can see the irony.

Sleep enhances our performance, our mental health and our overal wellbeing. 

I was a nightmare child who didn’t sleep through the night until I was seven (sorry Mum and Dad), I remember standing at the top of the staircase calling out and inventing excuses as to why I should come back downstairs (feeling thirsty and poorly tummy were my favourites) and as a result I don’t need much sleep as an adult. I am a morning person and not particularly a night time owl but around six hours is probably perfect for me. The average adult needs between 7.5 and 9 hours sleep per night, preferably uninterrupted. A lengthier night sleep can actually make you feel more tired and can result in a sleep hangover. No thanks, pass me the gin.

Humans are the only mammals that don’t take regular naps during the day. Thinking like that makes me think that Pooh had the right attitude. Most mammals take small 10-15minute naps throughout the day (my dog takes three to four 4hr naps throughout the day) although I’m not sure my classes would approve, it makes a huge amount of sense for productivity and quality of life.
Mattress quality is the next huge thing for sleep quality and back health. We are about to upgrade ours, with the average mattress lasting between 4 to 6 years and considering the amount of time you spend in it, it is worth investing in, we are a little overdue. The sleep council have more info on this should you require it. 

Taking some time out to think about your sleep routine and how you can enhance it is time well spent and may just make Monday mornings a little less stressful. Or instead you could use the time to nap. Either way you’ll be winning. 

What is your sleep pattern like?