The Flower doesn’t dream…

Quote by Mark Nepo.

Do you believe in soul mates? I do.

I also think there are people that are right for you at a certain point in time, but like all good sweaters you can grow out of them and at times they can stretch and look far better on someone else. I’ve had my fair share of sweaters and now I have found my soul mate. Unlike Prince Charming or the Disney ‘forever’ he isn’t always adoring, doesn’t ever notice when I’ve had my highlights done and leaves the dirty plates on the side rather than in the dishwasher. I guess if he was my perfectly fitted sweater upon reflection he can be a little itchy and I struggle to get my head through the neck hole at times. You see a soul mate doesn’t mean perfect fit. For me it’s someone who excepts me, loves me and allows me to grow and develop, in turn we do that together.

How I found him is a yummy story,  much like the quote and the cliche, I wasn’t looking. I was bored of relationships and wanted to date. I could write a book on some of the terribly dull dates I went on. I even drew a stick man of perfection to focus finding my Mr.Forever. Colour coded and labelled what I was seeking, from physical attributes to personality and even a couple of materialistic musts. Meanwhile he had been my friend for several years and I came home, called him and would share how the dates had been from Mr S not cutting the mustard, how unintelligent the man from the bank had been and how speed dating was defiantly not made for me (I speed drank to entertain myself let’s leave it at that).

More importantly when we spoke we discussed other things, he was just as busy as me and dating was a small aspect of my life. Traveling with friends, enjoying the London night life and making memories was at the centre of my world. I went to the gym, took yoga courses and despite my stick man of perfection, I was busy living and oblivious to the potential soul mate sweater by my side. I think this was the key, well there was more of a bunch of keys…

  • I didn’t need someone to complete me, I was content in my own universe.
  • However, I had my vision on what I required (a list of things all my ex’s weren’t) and I wasn’t prepared to settle or make do. Please never settle, or let friends do the same – life is too short to pretend.
  • Much like the flower I was blossoming and that has a certain attraction. It attracts quality Bees or in my case, a rugged muscle physic an independent nature, a desire to travel and a level of spontaneity that means life is fun but that I don’t feel vulnerable…oh and he had air miles. 

I love hearing how couples have met, ours was in Barbados but I’ll save that for another day.

Whatever your current sweater situation, be it you have so many your drawers are brimming (see what I did there) or perhaps you threw out the jumper that made you miserable, gave it to charity and cut off all emotional ties…only to see it worn by a friend or perhaps it keeps returning with the kids every alternative weekend. Whatever your current relationship status, be it happy ever after or riding the waves together or even a single pringle attitude, remember to focus on you first, much like a single flower head, if its abundant in good nectar the best Bee will find it…but watch out for green flies.


47 thoughts on “The Flower doesn’t dream…

  1. Oh I bloody love this!!! I’m also so happy I’m not the only person who has a Mr Perfect wishlist/guidelines… He’s not turned up yet mind and I can’t stand lateness!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’m with the perfect sweater at the moment! Happily married….. most of the time! He also seems to have the dishes next to the dishwasher rather than IN it affliction, he snores and can be a major grump. But it works for us all the same #marvmondays

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ah it took me a lot of ugly sweaters to find a pretty good fit. He turned up one night with some fancy sausages and a PS3, he’s still on my sofa now four years later so I must like him a bit. #MarvMondays

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I don’t like to think of my husband as Prince Charming, even though I am huge on fairytales, but he certainly is a jumper that fits me just fine and my old faithful that I’ll never throw away or donate to charity…..#MarvMondays

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This is lovely. So many people make do just to avoid beong single or on the flip side have ridiculously high expectations. I am very fortunate that I am married to my best friend and through thick and thin we get stronger. Thanks for joining us for #marvmondays

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ahhhh – this is lovely. I loved you quote – “a soul mate doesn’t mean perfect fit” – how very true. The hubby and I were friends before we got together too 🙂 – they are the best types of relationships….. xx #eatsleepblogRT

    Liked by 1 person

  7. This is so great 🙂 I’ve found the male version of myself which is really great but that also means we run each other up the wrong way a lot! I agree that just because it’s good for some time it’s not certain it’ll stay that way so it’s always work which isn’t always a bad thing 🙂 #MarvMondays

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Great post, I have a soul mate, when we moved in together everyone gave us 6 months, well 2 fi bers up to them, we celebrated our silver wedding anniversary earlier this year #satsesh@_karendennis

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I totally believe in soulmates and me and the Mr often know exactly how the other feels without the need to ask and we make a great team as we have very similar views! Thanks for hosting #thesatsesh


  10. I love the sweater analogy!

    I didn’t meet my husband till I was 31, like you I was also enjoying life, travelling and wouldn’t settle. My mum thought I was going to a be a lonely spinster forever because I kept turning down her offers to help. Think Bridget Jones mother 🤣



  11. Good advice, as always. I’ve only had one sweater that ever stuck, I’m still following it around 😉 #satsesh


  12. haha, i loved this. My flower is blossoming, I know what I want, unfortunately I am not sure that any bee is going to be good enough for me and my Cygnet. Our sweaters are perfect together. Pen x #thesatsesh


  13. Fitting post for me today, as I’m wearing an actual sweater which I bought not long after meeting my husband, about 23 years ago! Jeez, time flies, huh?!? I wasn’t looking at the time, was still getting over previous loves. But he came buzzing, and the rest is as they say, history. I think we’d both agree that we were a bit young to meet The One already, but at the same time it felt right and seemed too good to throw away… So here we are 23 years later, still together for better and for worse, and have now lived longer with each other than without. Nowadays, we’re very much ‘Team Penguin’ and I’m honestly not sure if we’d stayed together without him. But I’m thankful for my honeybee, even if he is hard work, lol xx


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