Be happy, it drives people crazy.

Anon

Despite the fact it’s still November consumerism seems to be taking hold of the nation/globe following Black Friday…the Friday sale that lasts a fortnight. Christmas chatter has taken over many blog posts and is the topic of conversation in our staffroom. Panic sweeps the nation. And I stay firm. I will not get swept into a frenzy on what I’m doing, got to do or who I haven’t bought for (the answer is nobody yet). There is plenty of time. However, I adore Christmas and refuse for it to become a burden. I stand firm in a smile. When asked how I feel about ‘all the catering’ I reply with a smile and say it’s an honour to have family to feed. I am not a saint but I know one thing to be true. Being happy really does drive other people  nuts. “Ohhh I don’t know how you can be so relaxed, I ordered the Turkey in June” hehe…yup and I was busy enjoying the start of summer.

It also means that for the people I dislike, hate and wish would disappear I increase my sparkle, smiles and graces – why? Because it pisses them off and reflects the stress and chaos back at them. I will not absorb negativity from them. It’s my super power and a skill that you should consider as a New Years resolution – forget weight loss, make 2018 the year you choose to be happy.

I choose happy because it makes me happy, it makes others happy and it’s contagious.

Christmas Day will come and go whether I stress or not. The dust will gather again from the moment I flick the duster, the bills will get paid and all those tasks on the ‘to do list’ will eventually be over taken with other tasks and thousands of other ‘to do lists’ but for now I am blissfully happy drinking a hot cup of tea after an intense yoga session, and for now and for always ‘I choose happy’ (and tea) (same thing)

Have you ever picked positivity as a power to piss others off?

The Saturday Sesh #14

I’ve noticed that this linky introduction has also become a reflection on my week. This week was tough as we didn’t have water (Kitchen is being renovated)  and cooking facilities were non existent. I have to say through the chaos came so many blessing’s – we really do take ‘gadgets and gizmos of plenty’ (couldn’t help pop a Little Mermaid quote there) for granted and it did mean we needed to plan things a little better. We were also blessed with awesome friends and family who reloaded our drinking water bottle for us, did endless loads of washing, washing up and my Mum cooked us a chicken to feed us for a couple of days, plus some cakes (just because), it really made me appreciate our tribe. My school also had its Winter Fayre which means one thing – it Christmas in a months time people, time to start making plans and creating memories.

As I stated previously, I am feeling very blessed to have such an awesome tribe. This week I’ve decided to break the rules and make my featured blogger my cohost – I’m not sure this is politically correct, morally ethical and I certainly haven’t told her my plans (sorry hun), but I asked Hayley to join me on this mission because I adore her ethics, her political views and her moral compass… plus anyone who teaches teenagers, has twins under three and a primary school aged child and blogs with no sleep is a legend. I adore her and have enjoyed making a new friend for life this year (nope, you’re stuck with me), I loved this post all about her passion for Mindfulness and believe her message deserves recognition. Please also check out her page to see who Hayley has picked as her featured blogger. That said, there were some lovely posts this week and The Rhyming Mum never lets me down, I adored find or fakes frank and honest post on her new journey. Well worth a read if you can make time.

Anyway, time to link up for week 14, below are the RULES, please be kind – its really unpleasant when we need to remind people to comment, badge up and generally follow linky etiquette.

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Click the blue badge below and you are on your way 🙂 Have a lovely week

Example is leadership #2 Davina McCall

As we move on with my series, please recap by Clicking for an introduction  to understand what this series is and why I’ve chosen to create it.

I feel a little behind when introducing this UK star, as the BBC did a ‘who do you think you are?’ programme on her (the TV series look into the ancestry of famous peeps), however I have always adored her and even more so since listening to her on Desert Island Discs on BBC Radio 4 recently, I actually listened to the podcast version and would totally recommend Davina’s.

Davina McCall was born in 1967 and I have to sit down whilst writing that this means she is half a century, she could give most twenty somethings a run for their money.

 

Davina was the first Big Brother presenter when it first aired in 2001, I was a fan of the first few series but mainly I tuned in to see DM. I also loved her on a show called ‘street mate’ where she would hook couples together on the street. I loved her sense of humour, her presenting skills are in my opinion superior and frankly she has always rocked her locks.

But that isn’t why she has made it into this series, nor is it her traumatic and toxic childhood, or her own battle with narcotics. Don’t get me wrong, these aspects intrigue me (we all like a happy ending) but its her own self doubt and ability to over come it that really makes her sparkle for me. In February 2014, Davina undertook a challenge called ‘Davina – Beyond Breaking Point’,  she also recorded a documentary during seven days of either running, swimming or cycling across the UK to raise money for the UK charity Sports relief. In my initial post I mentioned my distaste for humans, but for me Mrs M seems to epically rock ‘fragile vulnerability’ that consumes so many people. She has complete self doubt, prepares and does it anyway….as an onlooker, it would appear to me that she seems to thrives off of anxiety and I think she often surprises herself with her capabilities, and I like that level of sincerity. I’m not a DVD fitness fan – but I’d buy hers just to watch her smile and seriously, her abdominals are awesome. Not bad for a woman who has battled many dark corners of life.

Her ability to test her body, be a Mum and also have a clear sense of who she is makes her a national treasure. She is relatable and I imagine living with her is much like the Green day track: walking contradiction, she is both weak and strong, sensitive and blunt, fierce and fragile, focused and usually turns up late. Some how though, she gets the balance just right and it works. 

Never be a prisoner of your past, it was just a lesson not a life sentence

I’m not sure who this quote is by, but it seems to have a Hindu / Urdu meaning and this just makes it even cooler for me. 

We blame ourselves for past behaviours, but actually no matter how poorly we behaved, we did it in the moment with little thought of the repercussions. Many of the things we do as humans are often unkind (seriously take a look at the rate we are destroying planet earth) and yet we are also unaware of the how our behaviour both positive and negative can have on others. I once saw a girl in my school and asked if she was ok. I wasn’t particularly worried about her, but she didn’t look herself, it was a thirty second conversation. Several days later I found out through her form tutor that she had opened up about our brief conversation, until I had noticed she had felt totally unloved and disregarded…this time my words healed. I had no idea. 

I also can remember a time I allowed a man in my life to make me feel small, insignificant and he totally discounted my feelings and my heart. Luckily I later realised he wasn’t worthy of my time, love or energy. Sadly, he was probably reflecting his own faults on me and I allowed this. He had no idea. 

What’s my point? It’s that we totally underestimate the power of words, actions and our daily vibrations that we put out to the world, not just negative but also positive. We harber events in our lives and hold on to them for too long. Turning our minds in to lost property boxes full of ‘could have, should have’ regrets and empty promises. 

Life really is a journey and one that we are so blessed to take. Some of us experience horrendous things that others couldn’t imagine…but that doesn’t make us hideous, it was just events of that moment in time, lessons not life sentences.So how do we stop this cycle of hurt? unlike a prison sentence we learn from them.

  •  I will never let a man or woman make me feel anything other than fabulous. 
  • I will never underestimate the power of asking someone if they are ok 
  • I will always take the time to listen to their responses – this is living and inturn enhances our positive vibration. 

Each day as I work towards being kinder to my family and friends I also need to be kinder to me. Perhaps I didn’t react the way I’d liked in any given situation the day before, may be I wasn’t the best me I could be. This isn’t a life sentence. This is me and all I am required to do is live better each day and not repeat the same mistakes once I’ve recognised them, which sounds easier than actioned, So be kind to you today and let the past go, it might just be your ‘get out of jail free card’ to a better quality of life.  

Example is leadership (Intro)

Quote by Albert Schweitzer

Being human is complex. I’m not sure I’d actually like to consider myself part of the human race – we’re very often mean, selfish and ignorant. However, I am no different and have had my fare share of moments when I have imparted negativity on others; the awkward time (before I became a Teacher) that I got horrendously drunk at the office party and was a drunken pain in the *insert body part of your choice, to my then boyfriend. The time I was cruel to my best friend and ignored her, I was twelve; that isn’t an excuse and I was a horrid because I didn’t realise how much hurt I had caused her. The thousands of times over the last thirty something years I have spilled vile comments out of my mouth like grenades to loved ones, friends and even the women who carried me in her stomach for nine months (sorry Mum)…

Due to my disability (being human) I can’t promise that I won’t do any of the above things again over the coming days, years or moments. I also will probably experience grenades of negativity from others because other people that I share this planet with have the same disability, the population is increasing ten fold and this means human condition grows.

HOWEVER, what we do have is the ability to slow down. To breath and to make kinder choices, to say nothing instead of the horrendous words and actions we have previously intwined together. How? Well I have never claimed to have all the answers, but I have made a conscious effort for many years to be kinder, gentler and positive. I take my position as a role model extremely seriously, I care about how I present myself,  as I want the girls that I teach to present the best them to the universe. I care about how I make others feel because I believe that karma is something that rhymes with rich and I want my son to grow up with characteristics that matter. So, with my disability in check, I make these adjustments both forwards and back and sometimes I win and sometimes like any disease it takes hold of me.

For as long as I can remember I have collected people. (*Authorities need not worry there are no humans in my basement – in fact I don’t have a basement) Metaphorically speaking I have always been fascinated by humans, people watching is one of my favourite past times. When I was at university my bestie and I would sit in the front of a local cafe with a huge cup of hot chocolate and marshmallows people watch from the shop window. As we were both on a drama degree we would often create scenarios for the people and why they were in town, what they had purchased and usually added unnecessary details like what they had had for dinner and who they were sleeping with.

Much like horror movies, we all seem to be attracted to what we also dislike – my love / hate is humans. So, I have decided to share with you some of my favourite icons with a new series. I hope that my sharing the qualities I recognise in them, you can take something away with you that you see in people around you. Most of them will be famous, some will be personal and a few will be somewhere in between.

I will attach this post to the series titles so that readers will hopefully understand why this series exists, because no matter what our age from zero to one hundred we all need role models  to help us thrive.

One obvious last question – who are your role models, idols, mentors or humans that offer hope? 

The Saturday Sesh #10

Time flies when you cohost a linky. Week ten and I’m loving #thesatsesh more than I thought possible. We really do have a lovely group of people and I was pushed this week to pick a featured blogger – however, some I wanted to select didn’t have the badge displayed and so I couldn’t pick them. If you are joining us please make sure you follow the few simple rules listed below. I love the variety of bloggers that we have, styles of posts and when I read them I literally go from tears of sorrow to tears of joy. You lads and ladies rock.

Always give *Hayley and Mission Mindfulness and quick click to see who she has picked, but my featured blogger is the superb Diary of an Imperfect Mum who I think is nailing it with her Kon Mari of the mind…a few weeks a go I wrote a post begging for comments on how to minimalist my ever growing home (seriously, my living room is a magnet of plastic toys that seems to cascades from my sons room to every corner of our home), a couple of people wrote they had or were in the process of reading the Kon Mari book, a google through the internet got me ‘thinking’ in a KM way however Catie nails it by first dealing with the chaos that are our minds. I’ve seriously always got several million tabs opening in my mind, it make sense to discard the clutter and breath with ease and joy. Plus the last line of her blog – “what sparks your joy?” was like a calling card for this magical princess, my favourite hobby is appreciating the sparkle of life. So many thanks Catie for spreading the joy and reminding us to look after our minds, please grab a featured badge from my side bar should you please.


Lets get this linking going!

RULES:

  • Link up You can link up to 2 posts, old or new by clicking the blue box below
  • Grab a badge Please do add #thesatsesh badge. You can do this by copying and pasting the badge code into the text/HTML area of your post within your publishing platform and its located in my side bar for your ease.
  • Tweet Share your posts on Twitter using the linky hashtag #thesatsesh and tag us in for retweets @fridgesays @mummy_mindful. Follow us if you don’t already please.
  • Comment sit back, relax (its the weekend after all). Please use #thesatsesh and in usual linky etiquette comment on each of the hosts posts, mine and Hayleys, the post before and after yours. If you comment on more, that would be wonderful but FOUR is more than enough
  • Following the rules means you may qualify for our featured blogger announced weekly, plus this linky is run by school teachers so detention for anyone that doesn’t

OPTIONAL EXTRA: Come and play in our IG community by using #thesatsesh for photos of your weekend or perhaps connected to a post you’ve linked. Follow us on Instagram @fridgesays and @mission_mindfulness_blog and we will keep up to date and follow you back.

Lick the lid of life :)

Strangley there is a lack of yoghurt quotes in the world, so I pinched Muller yoghurts slogan from a few years back. 

Warning: this is a ramble that was going around in my head which I attempted to share with Mr F but he told me I was jabbering. So I thought, fine I’ll share my brain with the world instead.

I decided today that humans are basically the same as yoghurt. (Yup, this was the point that the Mr walked away) There are high brands and basic ranges, logos and cool kid varieties, that can come in awesome wrapping and even sometimes in a squidgy tube, some have character endorsements to make them even cooler #princessdisney

It must be sad to be a basic own brand yoghurt. Surely you’ve still got all the calcium goodness that the others have, in the pot you’re still made of the same ingredients, but some supermarket dude has labelled you as not worthy of a sufficient price tag as other pots.

Then there is the privileged and organic variety, the cows were perhaps treated better from birth and fresh grass meant that the yoghurt is superior and has more stuff than most right from the start. The price tag is high and picking this kind of yoghurt makes the consumers feel like they are saving the world one spoonful at a time.

Ohhh I should probably add that organics best friend or close relative is the probiotic branded kind. It’s like the fitness freak of the yoghurt family and even refuses to be eaten with a spoon. Instead it insists ‘on the go’ and is drunk from a sleek mini bottle. It’s more than a yoghurt and is promoted as a deity.It can cleanse your bowel, shuffle your ph balance to optimum ph-ness AND save you from 250 types of cancer you didn’t even know existed.

I wonder if like humans the yoghurts on the shelves look at each other and compare packaging. Or perhaps the more refined yoghurts read the labels of the lower price yoghurts when they aren’t looking to make themselves feel better (“ohhh he is high in sat fats and I’m not even sure why sour cream is in this isle?”). Firstly, I agree my imagination is at times rather ‘unique’ but judging packaging on yoghurt is just as absurd as us judging each others hair, occupation, cars, holidays, or how the couple across the road have afforded an extension and holiday (I’m not bitter). I’m not saying I don’t do it, I’m just acknowledging that it’s a weird thing to do if you look at it from a distance.

I also fully understand (within the mind set of yoghurt) why being a shop discount brands must be tough. For starters (let’s judge for a bit longer) your packaging is so basic it cracks, your lids loose and you sit opposite the smoothie with fricking bobble hats on. If I were yoghurt I’d want to have a brand, a place to belong. Perhaps even an advert on TV? I’d want to be low fat and have all the taste of full fat…I’d want to be yoghurt heaven…and then I gave it some more thought and I realised that I’ve overlooked a yoghurt that’s much more me…

The best yoghurt I’ve ever had was on holiday. It wasn’t over priced, it probably was calorie horrific but you can’t beat authentic Greek yoghurt. It’s thick, creamy and utterly tasty; so much so it doesn’t really need anything with it, it stands alone. My preference is a little honey but is also nice served with fruit or a dessert – human wise it works well as a team or individually. It’s authentic, it doesn’t have fancy labels, hype or need to be promoted. The taste has depth and clarity and most importantly its not trying to be anything more or less than it is.

So after my yoghurt rant I’ve decided we all should be aspiring to be us, full fat or otherwise…

  • Labels are man made and only read by people that doubt themselves.
  • True character doesn’t need media attention
  • Greek yoghurt is awesome
  • Own Brand yoghurt is essentially the same on the inside as all the other options – give it a try
  • Perhaps if we all knew our own self worth we wouldn’t need to judge the packaging of others
  • I like yoghurt 🙂

Sorry if you are lactose intolerant and had a reaction whilst reading this yoghurt rant. 

*Whatmyfridgesays takes no responsibility for this because its a made up rant with no ingredients, preservatives or other things found in foods that I don’t really understand.

Do the universe a favour and don’t hide your magic

This quote is from Yung Pueblo, a wonderful young writer and creative energy.

Fine, I picked the quote because it has the word magic in it, but it also spoke to me and reflected a journey I am constantly in. Recently in the UK we have announced GCSE results, as a teacher its my job to analyse the results my pupils got, celebrate the good and recreate it, critically analyse the negative and make sure the next cohort do better.

I had two pupils in my class that were capable of getting a B grade, but they got a D. I wasn’t surprised as they had both disengaged at various parts of the course / school life. This was their choice. They didn’t take up offers of revision sessions before or after school, they didn’t come to Saturday revision classes, they didn’t answer questions in class and on the surface I believe they received the grade that reflected their effort.

However, in doing so they didn’t show the universe what they were capable of. They didn’t sparkle, or shine. In front of them stood and opportunity and they let it slip. Does it matter? Probably not, not in the grand scheme of things. I’m sure they will reflect on the course and find blame on myself as a teacher, on others that distracted them, ill health, boyfriend/relationship issues or something, somewhere…but will they ever realise it was actually down to them not being prepared to show the universe they had extra sparkle?

Despite my career path I loathe examinations. That aside, it made me polish my wand. Reflect and learn. At first, it made me look at my other classes, recognise similar patterns and in the last few weeks I have moved seating plans, made phone calls home, set bespoke pieces of homework and then I applied this thought process to me. To today and what I did, or didn’t do yesterday. Exams are a unique way to pigeon hole a success at a given time, but actually each of us choose to shine and some of us are living much like our mobile phones, with low battery. 

What can I improve on tomorrow that I didn’t do well today? What would make me 2% better, kinder, happier, healthier…the list could go on. I really believe the list should go on. We never nail life, we should be nailing aspects each and every day. Make today better than yesterday and show the universe so much sparkle it will wish it had sunglasses. Have an awesome tomorrow 🙂 


 

Owning less is better than organising more

Quote by Joshua Becker

This quote resonated with me as I have a dream. To live in a minamilist house with a few precious objects. White clean lines and quality rather than quantity…

The current reality is a three bedroom house full of plastic (seriously my child is a plastic magnet), dog hair and crap that I might need ‘one day’. I’m not a hoarder or collector and I’m not a fan of ornaments, I like objects to have purpose SO WHY DO I OWN SO MUCH STUFF? I don’t go shopping that often and over the last few years I have refused to shop in many high street shops swapping quantity for classic pieces that are better quality, I even have a charity bag on the go all the time….still we have stuff everywhere? 

My house is like some sort of Bermuda Triangle of stuff, it seeps in through the cracks and clutters the side boards and surfaces. I’m purposely using the word stuff as I’m not sure what we have… most of it is practical, used and loved and I’m even thinking of moving house as an excuse to chuck it all (the actual reality would be a million boxes I’d never get around to unpacking and probably the purchase of even more stuff)

So, for once I don’t have the answers, not even close. Instead I’m asking you for advice on how to minamilise before I suffocate in stuff and drown in a pile of a toys. My living room looks like Toys R Us and only the bathroom is clutter free; even then I have to keep an eye on the ratio of bath water to plastic toys in my sons baths. Work surfaces that I clean are filled in an instant, Paper flows through our letter box like the scene from Harry Potter – the irony is that only one local take away will actually deliver to our village, so why do I need 65 flyers of exotic food that I can’t order? Then, why do those flyers get stuck on sideboards around the home, poked in corners and laid on the bottom of our staircase for days, weeks and in some cases months. 

Sorry to rant, although I do feel better – they say writing is therapy after all? In this case any practical tips would be welcome in the comment section, because honestly owning less would be so much less organising… 

Love a Minimalist wannabe x 

There is beauty in simplicity 

Quote Anon.

A while a go I was nominated by my blogging bestie Hayley from Mission Mindfulness to share my five favourite things. The post link was originally started by Mumzilla and as I’m a huge fan of anything that can be linked to gratitude, I thought I’d give it a go. Except I’m not really a fan of ‘stuff’ if anything I’m trying to move the mindset of my twenties that shopping is life and stuff makes me feel good… 

What’s even weirder is upon reflection, I couldn’t think of five things? Now as many of you know shoes are a thing I do enjoy. They didn’t make my top five though because I would never want to pick a particular heel over another, each pair has an outfit or occasion which would make it number one (*As you can see I’ve still got some work on being materialist)

These are the things I have selected, in the background is…


1). My yoga mat and block 

Why? I love yoga and I’m secretly competitive with myself and enjoy the progress I’ve made. I indulge in one to one classes each week and it makes me feel amazing. It’s my time to be ME. I’m not mummy, teacher or any other demand, it’s just my body mind and mat coming together. If I’m honest it’s my therapy into the week ahead. 

2). Hashtag Amazing Mug 


One of my pupils bought this for me for no reason other than she saw it and thought of me. It was an unexpected gift of delight and imbedded my belief that teenagers are just as thoughtful as any other generation. I do say “hashtag amaze” all the time and so it’s also very me and appropriate. 

3). Crystals 


This piece is Stilbite and Apophyllite (technically two pieces intwinned together) and lives on my bedside table. It is known for being good for meditation and used to contact guardian angels. It can help anxiety and stress but mainly I adore the fusion of the two crystals and think it’s pretty beautiful. Mother Nature is an awesome power house. 

4). Candles by Neom 


Can you tell I’m a female in my thirties? This scent is perfect. I usually go for a light cotton linen scent in candles, this is just a little different, more indulgent and my absolute favourite. It’s usually reserved as a Christmas gift and it lasts for such a long time. It’s like heaven in my living room. 

5). Engagement ring 


I do love a sparkle and picked this myself from an amazing selection of jewellery shops in Barbados. The stones around the edge are diamonds and the centre stone is a type of Amethyst that’s comes from the region. It seems to alter its colours in the light. Mr F and I met, feel in love and got engaged on this wonderfully little island so it’s more than just a ring to me. We recently returned in 2016 for our sons first holiday and I don’t plan to stop ever returning. 

Isn’t it funny how simple the objects I’ve picked are? Perhaps humans aren’t so complex after all? (Who am I kidding) 

To keep the gratitude and reflection going I’ve selected three more bloggers. However, if you would like to take part please do. 

My nominations:

Alana from Burnished chaos

Jess from Prosecco Mum

Miss Anon from The Single Swan