A smile is a curve that sets everything straight

Quote by Phyllis Diller

It’s late at night and I’ve been exhausted all week, you think I’d be snuggled up in bed, but I feel the need to vomit words all over this screen – so here I am typing, no plan and no agenda, just a over tired woman and the need for some typing therapy. Ahhhh I’m already smiling.

Lets talk about the humble smile…a simple smile is the easiest and cheapest way to live longer, give your health an over all make over (it reducing your chance of heart disease, lowers your blood pressure and reduces stress). New research even suggests that it increases your chances of success and it makes you more attractive to a potential partner or new born baby; seriously babies love a cheesy grin.

So with these facts in mind why don’t we smile more, do smile-aerobics, smile indulge diets (like a diet but increasing not decreasing – yup I made the phrase up), why don’t we take time to laugh, like we make time to do chores or attend important meetings?(*any meeting that claims to be important are always extra dull and guarantee to be pointless). Honestly, I’m not really sure of the answer, but its something that I think adults should do more.

I’m lucky that I never lost the ability from my childhood to belly laugh – I’m talking full tears, can’t breath, abdominal workout, could possibly die, hard core LAUGH. I do this most weeks and several days of those weeks. Maybe whilst reading this you’re pondering on when you last ‘lost it’ in the giggle department? Mine was yesterday when one of my GCSE pupils used Hannah Montana as an answer in her MOCK exam, or two days before that when one of my yr 7 pupils was in a drama lesson being a shark (obviously) and her jaw ached so badly in rehearsals that when she drank from her water bottle her mouth muscles spasmed sending the water the wrong way and out popped the water via her nose…yup, kids are funny. My son comes out with killer phrases of both joy and oddness most days, his five years old, so humour and naivety are his friends.

I’m not sure I can teach you how to belly laugh? I think it comes from living in the moment and not being afraid to control situations. I think its helped by watching youtube clips of cats falling, babies giggling and humans failing. wikihow has a link to ’11 steps to laugh more’ (with pictures) which I haven’t linked because I think its rather sad. I think we all have belly laughs waiting to explode within us and would totally encourage you to release them.

Mr F, as regular readers will know is a grumpy human, his face falls in a nature frown and very few things make him chuckle or smile even slightly. He mainly smiles when I’m rolling on the floor laughing at something and I’m in pain from it. Seriously, pain makes him smile – mainly at my expense. That’s the absolute joy of smiles, they come in all shapes and sizes and what makes an individual smile is unique to them.

TASK:

Write down three things that make you laugh / smile. My ‘try not to think before you type’ ideas go something like this:

  1. watching stand up comedians
  2. people watching
  3. horrendous ‘Dad jokes’ (Need to build an ark – I Noah a guy)

Now you have your list make time to do these every week, then daily and I promise you’ll be healthier and see many advantages, then add to the list of things that make you smile, there will be so many more than just three. I’m also partial to an old school cartoon like Tom and Jerry or Henry’s Cat. Laughing is contagious, so if you smile it also boosts those around you.

Like I said at the beginning of this post, I’ve had a seriously heavy week of being an adult, stress levels were high, responsibility lists were long and juggling home, work and life was a challenge – time to pop of some cartoons on I think?

Please comment below with either the things that make you laugh or your favourite Dad joke (the lamer the better) and when I’m feeling overwhelmed i’ll pop back for a smile through the comment section 🙂

Advertisements

Fight for the fairy tale, it does exist.

Quote by joy.F

I truly believe that we are all writing our own stories, chapter by chapter life is a series of new beginnings, challenges and climaxes…and of course the odd dark spell and baddy comes along and tries to jeopardise the heroine/ hero from achieving their purpose. I have chosen to live a life of happy ever after, but even with my most positive intentions, I often get thrown off course and have to realign myself.

Many people don’t come close to their purpose, to living aligned or anywhere near the fairy tale they desire. I think I know why, as yesterday I had an epiphany in the supermarket.

I was helping out with our school production and there was a large gap of time between the end of my working day and the show starting, so I decided to take myself to a local supermarket and purchase something for my dinner. It was a sunny and rare hot day in the UK and I really wanted a salad but also to indulge myself. Leaves don’t really cut it?

Solace in a supermarket can actually be rather therapeutic. So I wondered around the isles and placed a few of my favourite things in my basket. I looked down and found that my basket was unreservedly a middle class snobby delight. Who had I become? The content included:

  • Tyrell’s sea salt and black pepper crisps
  • a rainbow themed salad bowl (it was so pretty)
  • Sushi
  • Equinox Kombucha (some sort of fermented goodness in a glass bottle)

I giggled with shame…I went back to my office and enjoyed every bite. I felt good, knew what i’d chosen was the best – felt indulged and also rather healthy (if we excuse the crisps) but still I felt embarrassed. Until I saw this quote this morning. It was then that I realised that in that moment I had eaten and drunk exactly what I desired. As far as I’m aware Cinderella didn’t run off with the sleazy bloke at the bar (although we never really learn much about the prince in that particular story?), Snow white doesn’t marry the first forrest animal to come along and Pocahontas doesn’t hook up with the village idiot. So why shouldn’t my basket be full of what I want? Just like my life.

I’m buying it, I’m writing my own fairy tale… more importantly why am I judging my own basket? Forget social pressure and media corruption – perhaps (yup this is my epiphany) we don’t feel we are worth the fairy tale. Our own judgements block us from how we want to look, feel and in my case – the basket of food I purchase.

So listen up fellow fairy tale lovers, you ARE creating your own story. Sure, it’s likely to never have a Disney logo but just like my shopping basket it can be the best or at least what you want it to be. Don’t judge yourself – you’re totally worth it. Have your own back. If Mr Right hasn’t shown up, if Mrs Right now is lacking in basket delights…shop around. That’s why we have so many shops!

Be the fairy tale, but not Cinderella’s – be your own damsel and rescue yourself. Oh and never settle – fight for your happily ever after and never worry if anyone else agrees with it, they’re busy writing their own fairy tale…or haven’t had the wisdom to read this blog and have sad judgmental baskets of shopping.

Happy is the new rich

Great work from Anon.

Every now and then society enjoys a fad; minimalist living, various diets, exercise comes in an out of fashion – Zumba, HIIT workouts, hula hooping, unicorns and Pom-Pom’s, the list is endless. I’ve noticed that happiness is currently on the pedestal.

This is a fad that regular readers will know I completely adore. Every morning, whether I wake by the sunlight flowing through the window or my son pounces on my head like a meteorite – I choose happiness. It’s a decision that I continue to make throughout the day, most days. Sometimes I forget but then I look at my happiness bank account, I’m wealthy. A quick gratitude list of my assets helps to keep me flowing; abundant in good health for myself and family, a job that I adore (except on Monday mornings when I’m snuggled in bed and the alarm goes off) I am surrounded by a tribe of awesome people…and my dog, candles, books…

Being a millionaire of happiness is pretty awesome. My actual bank manager can’t touch it, I can spend it like confetti and the more I give out, the more I get back…win.

It takes effort and mindfulness, it takes self discipline to redirect my attention when the darkness creeps in – but I will always consciously decide to be happy.

If you live under darkness, then you too can be rich. It starts by doing one thing you enjoy for a few moments and allowing the light in. You’ll quickly find that a few pounds of happiness have been credited to your bank account. However, I fully appreciate that at times professional help is required and self care is needed. The great news is recognising your own needs also credits your happiness account.

I asked my five year old son why happiness was important?

“because it means you can do things that make you smile”

If I feel sad what should I do?

“Lots of things – get a drink, drinking water makes me and my tongue happy”

*warning being happy is highly addictive and is super annoying for anyone who isn’t happy.

** Five year olds are the epicentre of happiness and the true experts. However, ten seconds later they can explode in a ‘Hulk smash’ mentality and truly depict the fragility of being happy.

Be a good person but don’t waste time proving it.

Quote Anon.

The word that sprung to mind was ‘integrity’ when I saw this quote. It’s so important when you have an audience to still do the same things when your audience has gone home.

Being ‘good’ is obviously a word thats open to interpretation, but proving it is something I find people who are often insecure in their self do. Lets face it many people suffer from ‘lack of self love love’ and we certainly all have days where the self love monster eats our souls and spits us out in a top thats too tight, eyeliner thats clearly thicker on one side than the other – and thats only if we can be bothered to open our make up boxes.

Self love aside, there is nothing worse than meeting a person, thinking they are ‘good’ (feel free to enter any other adjective of your choice in here – I’m partial to ‘kind’ and also ‘stupendous’, although I just looked up good in the thesaurus and ‘ship shape’ made me laugh), only to find a few meet ups down the line that they are more plastic than Tiny Tears.

However, don’t despair below I plan to outline my own survival guide of 2018 for surviving and even thriving around these people. Its a comprehensive guide and I hope will be of value to you and others, in true fridgesays manner I have created it in magnets.

In essence, if someone is good to you or others to impress you or so you think they are good, suck up their good vibes like a baby and their milk bottle and don’t worry about their motivations. If they are doing it to impress you, firstly be honoured they give a shizzle and then know that in time people always show their true colours. I believe Phil Collins (legend of the 90’s) created a song around this theme, aptly named ‘True colours” although I can’t recommend the song to you, the video is hilarious with more fist pumps than the average 90s classic.

If you are an ‘impress’ kind of person, take a moment to sit down. Think about your motivations – if you want to bake a cake for people or show kindness and compassion, do it…if you feel socially bound, don’t. I live in a village and my son attends the local school, some of the parents are lets say a little keen to get involved. I am not. If its in my sons interest, I’m there. If its not or of no interest to me, I’ll avoid it like I do day time TV. I couldn’t give a scooby doo what any of the other parents thinks of me…why? because I don’t have the luxury of time to think about them and when I do have time, I’d rather show kindness to those in my tribe. I don’t aspire to be the class ‘rep’ Mum and I don’t wish to meet up with them in the holidays, unless my sons wants to see his friends.

I do think good role modelling is essential to our little peoples lives, and so try to be the best me. This summer I am planning a series of ‘acts of kindness’ to others beyond and within our tribe to educate my son on being grateful for what we have, sharing and giving to those that don’t.

So please, if you are anxious about what others think of you, spend the energy of loving you a little more and I promise what others think will become irrelevant.

Ssshhh I’m hiding from negative people

Quote Anon

This quote/ phrase made me smile. However, there is good news if you too are in hiding. You do not need to hide. Which is great as the media distributes negativity like Cath Kidson prints flowers, the majority of the world are moaning and if like me you try and keep your vibration up it can feel like the universe in colluding against you.

I am a ninja of positivity and a black belt in keeping my vibration high, why? My soul mate is a miserable git. This means I live with the dark side and over the years I’ve learnt all the tricks. Below I’m going to spread the love on how to remain positive when faced with doom (also known as ‘living with Mr F – a survival guide’).

  • Energy is attracted to like, so if you can spend time with like minded peeps – do so. I always avoid large meeting spaces like the staffroom, or children’s soft play – seriously stressful places.
  • When Mr F is downstairs in a grump, I move myself upstairs or to another room, I drown his noise out with music that’s upbeat
  • Change the subject. If you’re in a good enough vibration to hear that the person you’re talking to is being negative change the subject. If you can’t close that conversation down and get away. (See previous bullet point)
  • Sometimes I laugh at Mr F, probably not the best advice but it raises my vibration and is a clear message to him that he is grumpy.
  • I make time in the morning to work on me, before the world and Mr F grunts. This means I’ve already established my pattern and I’m flying high. (Things you can do to achieve this include meditate, listen to your thoughts, set intentions, establish a good morning routine, listen to a positive podcast)
  • I end the day how I want. I don’t follow Mr F to bed when he is tired. I might stay downstairs or do my own thing. If I do follow him it ends up in a squabble.
  • I keep busy – feeling accomplished helps me to vibrate higher.
  • If a crack of a smile should enter Mr Fs face I celebrate it. AKA enjoy it whilst it lasts.

How do you stay smiling when the world outside is grey?

You’ll turn out ordinary if you’re not careful

Quote by Ann Brashares.

This quote made me smile. So many people of all ages lack a love for themselves. Why? Most of us are trying to be someone we aren’t. Perhaps not all of the time, but as we juggle all of the various hats on that we wear throughout the day we prefer the fit of some and hide behind others.

During my early teaching years I tried to emulate colleagues who I thought did the job well, or teachers who taught me. It didn’t work. It wasn’t me.

As a mother that was an entirely new hat (complete with ruined core muscles) that took a while to fit. I needed my hat adjusted as I took on the new role. To work out who my mum tribe was, to raise my little dude in our own way and to adjust the hat to fit me. I can’t mum like my mother did, I’m not her, although she is an amazing example, I’m raising my child in a different era with a new journey ahead of us. It took a while and needs constant adjusting but my mum hat is bespoke. It’s me and it fits like a dream.

I’m not sure anyone is happy to live an ordinary life, I think we would all opt for sparkle and quirk. However, there are a few things you need to do to live this life.

  • You need to be brave, to step away from the crowds when it doesn’t suit you.
  • You need a tribe around you that accepts you, cracks an’ all.
  • You need time to yourself, balanced with time with loved ones. There is a lot of research to suggest we ‘are’ the five people we spend the most time with. If these people are ordinary so are you.

I can’t juggle my ever growing hat stand without time for myself; to be creative, to be healthy and to be quiet. The world is a whirl of distractions and so I need to breath and pause, to check I’m on the pathway that best fits me.

This week perhaps you need to check your own hat stand out. The hats that are last season, the hats you hate, the hats you wear because everybody else does. Perhaps it’s even time to buy a new hat. Just make sure the hats are your own design and not made for somebody else.

Happy hat shopping.

Make it pop like pink Champagne.

Quote from the lyrics of Ariana Grande. I’m totally using this quote as an excuse to open a bottle of pink bubbles (you know for photography authenticity)

I have a secret, which if you ever met me isn’t the greatest secret ever. In my head I am a fairy. When I first met Mr F he named part of my personality as ‘Fairy’, this is the ditzy blonde, petite and often totally mistaken element of me, this is the part of me that didn’t realise that cars gave way on roundabouts in the UK to the right…until I had at least ten years of driving experience (I just thought people were kind) and Mr F pointed this out…ops! Fairy is also identified when I sing the wrong lyrics out loud incorrectly clueless to my own error, when I suddenly realise that things aren’t pronounced or therefore spelt how I thought they were for the last thirty years; examples include ‘Ham bags’ (leather…meat, it made sense in my head?) or that I drove through Blackwall Tunnel for several years oblivious to the Thames water over my head.

However, my definition of me as a fairy is magical. I have secret powers. Technically, we all have these powers but I harness them whilst many wallow in misery and self doubt…the secret power I possess is that I fully believe that the thoughts I have become my reality. I notice my thoughts, pay attention to them and go out of my way to avoid negative people. I am mindful in how I perceive others and more importantly myself. I don’t let myself indulge in ‘mindLESS’ entertainment on TV. I continuously cultivate my mind daily. Some days I am successful, other days I don’t always fully succeed – but I always go to sleep reflecting on what I did do well.

A few weeks a go I went to a funeral of a lovely member of my family. She was such a huge character and as I reflected on how grateful I was to have had her in my life. I realised that in other conversations around the room people chatted of mundane tales of life and that the highlights were sharing tales of her that made us laugh, giggle and reflect. Stories that stirred a ‘Pop pink Champagne’ reaction within us. Listening to the fizz and delight of life (seriously how lovely is that noise), perhaps you are more a ‘cold pint with moustache’ kinda dude or a warming ‘mulled wine’ worldly woman – what ever life’s tipple is, shouldn’t that be a daily goal for us all? * I’m not suggesting we all become alcoholics, this is just an analogy, I am suggesting that we make time to enjoy life even in the bleaker moments.

As a Fairy, I am 100% a pink Champagne popping princess. This analogy isn’t about financial wealth, but to me a quality product, with an edge (its pink), with a beauty, vitality and energy (the pop), an energy that makes others who sample its delight feel special. A treat. For me an indulgent necessity.

Pink Champagne is chilled, it knows when to make noise (back to the pop again) and when to settle in the glass, when to tingle of the tongue – best of all, it looks at life through rose tinted ‘glasses’ and always makes me want to dance. Its this description of life that I aspire to.

What’s your tipple of life?

Lick the lid of life :)

Strangley there is a lack of yoghurt quotes in the world, so I pinched Muller yoghurts slogan from a few years back. 

Warning: this is a ramble that was going around in my head which I attempted to share with Mr F but he told me I was jabbering. So I thought, fine I’ll share my brain with the world instead.

I decided today that humans are basically the same as yoghurt. (Yup, this was the point that the Mr walked away) There are high brands and basic ranges, logos and cool kid varieties, that can come in awesome wrapping and even sometimes in a squidgy tube, some have character endorsements to make them even cooler #princessdisney

It must be sad to be a basic own brand yoghurt. Surely you’ve still got all the calcium goodness that the others have, in the pot you’re still made of the same ingredients, but some supermarket dude has labelled you as not worthy of a sufficient price tag as other pots.

Then there is the privileged and organic variety, the cows were perhaps treated better from birth and fresh grass meant that the yoghurt is superior and has more stuff than most right from the start. The price tag is high and picking this kind of yoghurt makes the consumers feel like they are saving the world one spoonful at a time.

Ohhh I should probably add that organics best friend or close relative is the probiotic branded kind. It’s like the fitness freak of the yoghurt family and even refuses to be eaten with a spoon. Instead it insists ‘on the go’ and is drunk from a sleek mini bottle. It’s more than a yoghurt and is promoted as a deity.It can cleanse your bowel, shuffle your ph balance to optimum ph-ness AND save you from 250 types of cancer you didn’t even know existed.

I wonder if like humans the yoghurts on the shelves look at each other and compare packaging. Or perhaps the more refined yoghurts read the labels of the lower price yoghurts when they aren’t looking to make themselves feel better (“ohhh he is high in sat fats and I’m not even sure why sour cream is in this isle?”). Firstly, I agree my imagination is at times rather ‘unique’ but judging packaging on yoghurt is just as absurd as us judging each others hair, occupation, cars, holidays, or how the couple across the road have afforded an extension and holiday (I’m not bitter). I’m not saying I don’t do it, I’m just acknowledging that it’s a weird thing to do if you look at it from a distance.

I also fully understand (within the mind set of yoghurt) why being a shop discount brands must be tough. For starters (let’s judge for a bit longer) your packaging is so basic it cracks, your lids loose and you sit opposite the smoothie with fricking bobble hats on. If I were yoghurt I’d want to have a brand, a place to belong. Perhaps even an advert on TV? I’d want to be low fat and have all the taste of full fat…I’d want to be yoghurt heaven…and then I gave it some more thought and I realised that I’ve overlooked a yoghurt that’s much more me…

The best yoghurt I’ve ever had was on holiday. It wasn’t over priced, it probably was calorie horrific but you can’t beat authentic Greek yoghurt. It’s thick, creamy and utterly tasty; so much so it doesn’t really need anything with it, it stands alone. My preference is a little honey but is also nice served with fruit or a dessert – human wise it works well as a team or individually. It’s authentic, it doesn’t have fancy labels, hype or need to be promoted. The taste has depth and clarity and most importantly its not trying to be anything more or less than it is.

So after my yoghurt rant I’ve decided we all should be aspiring to be us, full fat or otherwise…

  • Labels are man made and only read by people that doubt themselves.
  • True character doesn’t need media attention
  • Greek yoghurt is awesome
  • Own Brand yoghurt is essentially the same on the inside as all the other options – give it a try
  • Perhaps if we all knew our own self worth we wouldn’t need to judge the packaging of others
  • I like yoghurt 🙂

Sorry if you are lactose intolerant and had a reaction whilst reading this yoghurt rant. 

*Whatmyfridgesays takes no responsibility for this because its a made up rant with no ingredients, preservatives or other things found in foods that I don’t really understand.

Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles 

Anon, *although I like to think Mary Berry or Delia came up with this little gem.  

Cake and magic in one quote is always going to get my attention. Firstly, I believe I’m a cupcake. Of course I have muffin moments, but I believe there are great things to come with sprinkles on top. Every child I teach and especially my son – I want cupcakes for their lives, but more importantly I want them to have the inner hope that miracles happen and no matter how bleak today was, tomorrow will always be better.

It’s easy to be a muffin. To lack the sparkle and glitz of a cupcake. After all everyone knows sprinkles on cupcakes are compulsory. I’m also partial to a ratio of more icing than cake. 

Muffins are wholesome and I imagine (if they could) they would shop in sensible shops and alway have a cagoule or umberella in their bag just in case. Muffins are usually packed with something non-naughty like raisins, nuts, seeds and fruit and that’s okay. Seriously, my previous post was all about not judging and would be easy to slate and hate on the healthy muffin option, compared to the glitz and glam of the cupcake… but that’s not my style or what I think this quote is about. 

I think we all have muffin moments, especially when pregnant and just after (okay, years after for me), we eat well and get by, we rock the messy bun and frankly we get stuck in a rut of the same two outfits, the comfy cardigan or the pumps that are easy to slip on by the front door. It’s essential at this point that we don’t judge because easy access shoes are fab and with Autumn looming I’m all about a snuggly cardigan. I think this quote is about reminding us to not slip into a rut because we’ve forgot the ten thousands pairs of shoes hidden in our wardrobe, perhaps the hat with the cute logo or the over sized sunglasses that make you feel like a film star. It’s these moments when we become a cupcake. 

It’s probably not healthy to eat cupcake everyday, but life is too precious to be a muffin forever more. So this is a post to remind us to rock the shoes, wear the outfit that’s 100% impractical but 1000% fabulous…add the icing and enjoy the things that make you happy. As always from my fridge doors – dare to dream and go for it.

Celebrate every tiny victory 

Quote by Anon
This quote excites me. In a ‘live for today ‘way, rather than counting down to the next big event and slowly wishing our days away.

Back in 2009 I was pregnant and like all chaotic moments – buying a house. The year seemed to be eating at our souls slowly, so much to do and so little time to do it in. More terrifying was where to start. It was at this time that my midwife encouraged me to relax more and Mr F started taking me to the pub for a celebratory lemonade (outrageous I know) in the afternoon, it was the last trimester where I was reluctant to leave the house. With money tight we felt the need to have a reason to go out midweek and so we started to celebrate our daily victories. Send paper work off – Chink, to a week later completing a survey on the house or buying a pram – chink. 

Mile stones seem to follow with the birth of a baby; from rolling on their tummy to first steps. Yet just before two years the mile stones ease and the celebrations frequency seems to also.

My ‘to do list’ is endless and although when I complete individual tasks I feel satisfied I never really celebrate the end of the list. I’ve never wrote a Facebook status on the topic, or even tweeted my joy…in fact until now I’ve never taken the time to reflect that I have ever got to the end of the list, perhaps because I’m busy writing tomorrow’s ‘to dos’ and that isn’t healthy or productive. 

Tiny victories make for happy souls. Think how far you’ve come since the start of the year, the month or even what you’ve achieved this week. May be even jot them down.

  • Got home earlier than usual 
  • Cooked dinner, sat and chatted to Mr F over said dinner with candles lit and…
  • Toys cleared away
  • Two loads of washing 
  • Wrote this post 🙂 
  • Participated in a linky by commenting on other blog posts 
  • Updated Instagram @fridgesays and Twitter whatmyfridgesay 
  • Showered 
  • Planned outfit for tomorrow

Okay, so perhaps this isn’t the makings of a God like figure, but this list occurred in a three hour time frame, with family around, distraction and with other many victories in between.
The washing pile took a battering, my blog blossomed, Mr F and I connected and that’s healthy progress, if we slowed down and noted the commendable moments that pass so many of us by, perhaps we would all have a little more self love and less doubt. How many people would love to start a blog but don’t have time are too busy to sit down mid week and share a meal, now before I award myself a medal and you think I’ve lost the plot here comes the magic

You’re victorious too. We all are. We just forget to celebrate it. 

What we don’t realise is that celebrating doesn’t need a social media status, a party for 6000 people or a food/drink reward.

It takes tiny moments and a tiny amount of time to recognise and enjoy the self satisfaction of what we have done, rather than going to bed with a list of all we still have to do, feeling exhausted and like we are failing. 

Today is a gift and that’s why we call it the present, perhaps this is our most precious victory and it isn’t so tiny. 

If you suck at looking at your daily victories, I have a game that may work. 

Just before I pull into my village on the way home I go over my day and remind myself of eight moments where I was successful. (I’m not sure why eight, it just feels right for me) The best bit about this game is I now ask J (aged three) what his favourite moments were, it can easily be adapted. By the time I’ve put the car in neutral and removed the car keys I always feel good about my day and what I have achieved. 

A positive mindset helps you reach your goals quicker, lifts your soul and even makes for a happier being. What’s not to love? Start treasuring your achievements everyday. You are victorious