Beauty is in the mind and not in the mirror

Quote from me! @fridgesays

I feel like every bathroom facility across the globe that has basins with mirrors above should have this around it. As I typed the quote out I internally thought, I know that but I’m not sure I always implement it.

For this reason, today’s post is a reminder that you are unique. You are beautiful. You have features that are superior to others and flaws that make you an individual. When we look at images from silicone valley or we forget that people in the media’s eye often use more filters that Lego have made plastic blocks, be kind to yourself and how you talk to yourself.

Sometimes I feel good in certain outfits at other times they feel like they don’t reflect how I feel and can have the opposite effect.

I can purchase beauty products, buy new clothes, exercise, sleep, eat well and at the end of the day look in the mirror and feel mortified by what I see reflected back. When you catch yourself giving yourself a hard time, you need to become your own fairy god mother – we all should go to the ball. If a girl with pumpkins and rats can do it, I’m sure we all can. I’m a woman with a goldfish, a gecko, a dog, two African snails and a tank of stick insects.

Here’s my godmother recipe:

First, stare in the mirror and laugh at how privileged you are to have a mirror.

Next, step back slightly and decide whether the lighting is doing you any favours or is it more like a light box game from the 1980’s, remember not all light is flattering.

Step three: Like a good friend, reason with yourself. How’s the day gone? Does the frizzy hair represent the rainy school run, are the bags under your eyes due to night feeds and are the spots hormonal? if so..remind yourself that you succeeded to collect your child from school, feed your child and that hormones are a sign of health.

Challenge time, rather than focus on the spots, frizzy hair and bags under the eyes. Look in the mirror and pick THREE features you love. Perhaps it’s your laughter lines that remind you of good times, or your lips, maybe you like your hair up, down or are just glad you found time to wash it.

Lastly, look at your features and think about your loved ones. Do you have the same eyes as your Dad, the curve of your nose is the same as your daughters, how blessed we are to have reminders so near to us…unless your family are douche bags in which case casually miss this step.

Lastly and totally nonnegotiable…create time for some self care. A hot bath child free, a hair wrap or time to do your nails…because like this post stated at the beginning, your beautifully perfect just the way you are and deserve to be treated so.

You are something magical

 Every time I look at my son, he is magical. The way he manipulates me, engages me, goes off and faces new challenges and doesn’t need me – he fills my heart with joy and he has developed a magical talent for making me absolutely furious and then with literally a blink of his blue eyes reminds me how scrummy he is.

However, this post isn’t about him…it’s about you.

When I look in the mirror I love what I see. Jennifer Anistons reflection would be preferred and sure I recognise my imperfections but ultimately I love me.

I’m worthy of the best and I desire to be better…

How do you feel about you? Most people can see others negative and positive qualities but magnify only their own negatives.

In my class we play a game –

Everyone writes their own name at the top of the paper, they fold it and then everyone in the circle takes a turn at writing something positive about that person. All the comments are hidden by fanning the paper as you go to conceal the answers…at the end the person who’s name is at the top opens it up and reads the positive comments – this is great for positive reinforcement and self love.

Amazing motovational speaker and founder of Hay House, Louise Hay is a huge fan of ‘mirror work’ there are many variations but in essence you look in the mirror and affirm that you love your self, that you are worth it…and so on. When you rub against negativity you work on those areas. I’m not sure you go the full ‘mirror mirror on the wall’ but I wonder how many people avoid just looking at there own reflection. Growing up I had a friend who had no mirrors in her house, not one.

Do you look at women in the media and see yourself as insignificant? Do you make jokes at your expense before other can, perhaps to hide your insecurities?

Today remember that you are amazing, you have achieved so much already and hold so much potential – remember you are magical and deserve to be told this and believe this. Loving yourself isn’t arrogant its essential.