mum blogger

Back to school

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

Not really a quote?

I have lived the majority of my life within a school setting, as a result September it a ‘new year’ moment for me, time to reflect and of course purchase new stationary.

With my new diary updated and my fresh pens out of the pot, it’s also a time that I reflect and also establish new goals for the coming ‘academic’ year. This year the little dude is in his last year of Primary school. I’m excited for the opportunities he’ll have and also closing his village school chapter as he spreads his wings (and probably loses all of his new stationary in the process) into secondary school life.

As a result I have a very simple goal. To be in the present. Rather than planning ahead or worrying about things that haven’t happened (future lost stationary) I am going to try and be more present, enjoying and appreciating the moment. We know life flies at a hundred miles an hour and as a parent you do have to make plans ahead of time, certainly as a working Mum I also need several arms completing various tasks at the same time…but pausing and taking in the moment is something we can sometimes over look.

Today (Sunday) my son returned to Rugby training, another season welcomed us in and I realised that the new term had already begun. My plans were to get home, prepare dinner, clean and get organised for the school week ahead…instead I’ve decided to abandon the kitchen chaos and instead, as a family we are going paddle boarding. Why? The sun is out (not something that has been observed much this summer holidays) and I feel the need to drink in the last moments of summer. To capture the most of us as a family in this moment.

To help me focus on the ‘now’ I’m going to move my gratitude diary that I complete every morning to the evening, so that I can reflect on the day and the little moments it holds.

Back to school can mean anxiety for many individuals and if that’s your child, I would recommend getting them to focus on a small part of the day (getting ready or travelling to school) and taking the day in bite size pieces. When they return home, without sounding too PollyAnna, whilst they might have concerns to share with you it useful to balance out emotions by reflecting on a few moments that they did enjoy.

May I take this moment to thank the staff at the schools that support our young people and wish all the students the best of 20023-24. Education is a gift for those brave enough to embrace it rather than ‘go because I have to’ and with an open mind (hard for some children I appreciate) often it leads to incredible opportunities.

Never let your storm get your kids wet

~ Fridgesays ~ Leave a comment

Quote Anon

When I was little my Mum took me and my friend to school in snow on a sledge. She heaved us through the streets on a few inches of flakes. It was joyful (well for my friend and I), when I was older my Mum and I went to a huge market. I drove her in my brand new two seater convertible. Once we’d walked around the stalls we decided to head back towards the car park – the heavens opened and if I say it rained I would be underestimating your understanding of rain, it was more like walking through a giant wave. We laughed because it actually hurt as the rain fell from the sky, we couldn’t believe we’d got caught and giggled all of the way home, grateful for heated leather seats and every time we glimpsed each others sodden exterior we erupted in laughter again.

That by the way was a metaphor, one that unpicks this quote. It resonated with me because this week I have come across too many children exposed to adult topics of conversation and worry. No matter what your circumstances the storms of life that bring you down don’t need to be shared with little ears, processing these can often lead to trauma responses for them as they take on adult emotions. If you are carrying something heavy, you can either work towards putting it down or carry it away from your child.

Finance or lack of and rising living costs in my opinion aren’t concerns for children. Exposing children to adult addiction’s often mean the children grow up within the shadows of these circumstances. That said I’m not sure we should paint adult life as sunshine and lollipops, we can sometimes laugh in unfortunate times, we can take the positive from a negative situation and we can role model self respect, resilience and endurance when storms approach. This has to happen at an age appropriate time, exposing the child to witness elements of storms from a distance before the rain hammers down on your doorstep, or putting in place boundaries around relationships and potential hazards.

Varying weather conditions are expected in the UK. Temperatures can dip overnight and summertime can sometimes mean taking a coat when you leave the house. Wrap your children up close and don’t expose them to unnecessary burdens. If I had a coat and my son didn’t, I would instinctively give it to him. Do the same with your words.