Quote once again from the awesome Anon. This quote is a good one.
I would say I speak less than I did before my son was born…Mr F would obviously disagree. I was the child at parents evening who was always told she was ‘very chatty’ and so even if I worked extra hard to filter my mouth, as my ratio of traffic is so high it doesn’t make a difference to my audience, in fact installing traffic lights or even a roundabout through my mouth wouldn’t help either, so please don’t think I’m an expert on the quieter side of life.
However, I have put some filters in that didn’t exist in my twenties. For example, I think more and much deeper than I ever did previously. I read more and I listen to pod casts that enhances my knowledge and perspective. I also realised by listening more, I’ve become highly critical of peoples social skills and think in turn this has enhanced my communication skills. I’m much better at listening and being active in conversations.
My Mum can vouch that for the first seven years I didn’t sleep through the night, but for a good sevenTEEN I didn’t listen, especially to my parents telling me to go to sleep, or to anyone in authority, or to any of my friends…okay and any member of the human race. However, becoming a Mummy altered my perception of noise. Frankly a new born baby makes far too much and so quiet and calm moments become precious. I also don’t wish to fill his head with negativity and spend my entire life saying NO to him and limit his world. I’m cautious with my words and his sponge like mind filters every little letter and files it away (usually to use it against me at a later point in the the day).
However, why am I sharing my noise levels with you…because people that jabber really irritate the crap out of me. They speak nonsense and talk about things they have little knowledge of, BUT when someone regardless of age or any of the categories we like to pop humans into speaks with passion, truth and depth – it’s like a firework display in my soul. I become coal like; at first dark and cold but as they speak I burn bright and glow from the inside…and when they stop I turn to ashes leaving my thought process in a new state, not better or worse – just different.
This quote is really on my ‘to do’ list and like I stated at the beginning, it’s working practice for a chatter box to filter their thoughts out loud, but I do recognise it’s something worth pursuing.
So how do we start, like everything I think we start with small steps. We apply how we use our mouths to how we use our online presence when we comment on social media, share or interact. We listen a little deeper, speak a little less and when we do open our mouths we first open our hearts. Sounds simple doesn’t it, then why am I still trying to work it out?
I have exactly the same issues. I spent so much of my early life talking and chattering away I missed a lot of what other people had to say. It’s a constant job to pause, think & listen. But the benefits are huge. I read daily, I listen to podcasts and radio shows that enhance my understanding of the world, that make me laugh and sometimes make me cry. Thanks for sharing x
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Love this comment, thanks for writing it. I’ve stopped watching tv – have you?
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We watch hardy any regular TV. A few times a year we’ll tune in to a couple of epic drama serials, but is mostly documentaries. Real life stories are so compelling, it’s hard to watch fiction!
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Though so – us too. We like a box set every now and then but tv drains the soul x
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I agree with your refrigerator! My husband is more guilty of this than anyone on the planet. Yup. I just called the man I love out, but it’s true!
I have also stopped watching TV…unless it’s on in my kids rooms!
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Haha love a call out x
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Mmmm. Good thoughts. I love quiet and I rarely put the tv or radio on. I just need space for my thoughts and processing. A nicely different post. Thanks #dreamteam
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I invigilate exams and love the peace and quiet away from the laughter and shouting of my kids, just to think my own thoughts aaaaaaah! #triumphanttales
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Yes! When I grow up I’m going to do this, I’m a teacher at the mo – so not so peaceful. You must leave like you’ve meditated x
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at 45 i have removed my filter and think sod it, i’ve spent years trying to keep everyone happy and it’s not made a bit of difference to how I’ve been treated
#TriumphantTales
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Haha I guess you can filter the another way also – perhaps balance of noise and making it is what we all need.
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I have always and probably always will be a chatter box. My friends are always telling me to skip to the end of my story as I can take forever to get to my point. But its endearing (I think) but when Hubby chats shit it drives me insane!!
Thank you for sharing this with us at #TriumphantTales. I hope to see you back next week!
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Hope to be back lovely, quietness is awesome – it’s just working progress
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Listening is a gift to all those around you! Great post! Thank you. #dreamteam xoxo
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Thank you for commenting lovely x have a fab weekend
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If i need to think, I need to have quite. My husband is the total opposite. For instance when I am commenting on blogs or writing posts I can not have anything in the background. I have always been a deep thinker, maybe because of my communication problems I struggle to put words in to sentences X #ablogginggoodtime
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Do you find it easy to put words in sentences in your head, or just out loud? Thanks for commenting x
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Both, depending on situation and how I am feeling X
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You are your husband seem a good combo of yin and yang. I wish I could quieten my mind more often.
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My childhood has led me to speaking less and listening more. I totally agree with your point on people that jabber and those that don’t. #ablogginggoodtime
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Your fridge really does say the most profound of things. I love your coal analogy. I’m quite an introvert myself and haven’t got much of an appetite for shouting to make my voice heard, so if I’m in a conversation with a “noise maker” I tend to go very quiet and nod with a smile. It drives my hub potty when we’re in an argument as I can literally zone him out silently so that he no longer exists haha. Thanks for linking this with #DreamTeam x
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That is a seriously cool skill, have you done it since you was a child? Or is it just a husband strategy x
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Since a child. I can zone out anything completely and it’s like “you are no longer on the planet to me now” as I continue to go about my business. It’s a technique that keeps me sane and simultaneously drives the hubby nuts! 😉 x
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It’s the gift of all long term relationships 🙂 well jel, gonna get me some ‘rhyming zone out wine’
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Hahaha I shall send some your way via Wi-Fi. 😘
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I’ve always been more of a listener than a talker but I have an awful habit of trying to fill awkward silences by talking too much. I need a filter for these moments! #thesatsesh
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Haha everyone does. May be let the other person fill it next time
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I always seem to come across your posts just when similar thoughts are knocking around in my head. I’ve been learning new things about communication lately and am trying to listen more and speak less. I don’t find it easy but it reaps dividends when I manage it! #thesatsesh
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Absolutely lovely…listening is so good for the soul too
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I am a very quiet person. As I got older, I found it to be a good thing. I realized that talking too much does not make you knowledgeable however, listening a lot does. 😊 #thesatsesh
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Winning babes!
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I love this quote. I love silence and solitude and find that I cannot concentrate, or even think, with background noise. Pen x #thesatsesh
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Same. Solitude is sooo good for the soul, ironically loneliness isn’t
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This really reminds me of a rhyme I read with the kids about a wise owl who speaks less and hears more…. it’s very lovely (not that I’ve paraphrased it very well)! xx #thesatsesh xx
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Haha what’s that lovely old owl like ey x
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