I got my own back 

~ Fridgesays

Quote from one of my favourite females, Maya Angelou

I’m an only child. There are myths that I was lonely, isolated and spoilt as a child because of just this ‘fact’. However, I was never lonely and was always allowed a friend for tea, or would take part in extra curricular activities in whatever my flavour of the month was (I’ve always lacked commitment). My parents lives revolved around me and I was spoilt with time and opportunities, when it came to material objects I was like every other child and had to wait until Christmas or birthdays, that said I don’t remember going without.

I loved being ‘just me’ and am truly grateful to my parents and family for all the wonderful memories we grew together and don’t panic, I was socialised and therefore can share should the occasion arise.

One of the things however that people don’t associate with only children is that I’ve got my own back. It’s an awesome skill that has given me resilience. I’m not saying siblings can’t have their own backs to; after all it’s your back to do what you like with it, right? That said I know many siblings whose relationships have bought hostility and also others with unity, again they can have their own backs or not. 

However for me personally growing without siblings has meant I have had to be my own competition, I set the goals and with heinsight I’m my own little team. I’ve also expanded my family with a few close friends who I know I can count on. I’ve always had just one very close friend and then people that surround that relationship. If I’m honest I’m very much a ‘people’s person’ who doesn’t really like humanity. As I have grown older I’ve definitely become picky about who is on ‘team fridge’ and many a human has had the fridge door shut in their face. Sometimes it’s warmer in the fridge without negative vibes.

Recently my son (only child on earth) was playing in our local park and his little friend was playing with some other children, the boy announced that my son couldn’t play with him. My heart ached for him. However, my robust little dude continued to play happily by himself and whilst I was watching and dealing with my own emotions, it was Mr F that pointed out that our little dude wasn’t bothered. Not convinced I obviously had a chat with him on the way home and I realised that he really wasn’t bothered, in fact he said “it’s okay Mummy, if ****** doesn’t want to play then he doesn’t have to.” That’s when I realised that my awesome little dude had his own back. Kids are harsh and our little dude is no more innocent or lovely that any other – humans are cruel, but being your own number one has got to be of benefit.

You are the only person that has experienced everything you have, been with you 24/7 – for better or worse. This is why self love is essential, it gives you a worth that will radiate to others, but if for any reason it doesn’t radiate – self love means it doesn’t matter what others think, you’ve got your own back.

Maya Angelou was such a wise human (there are a few) and her quotes are my all time favourites. I think the reason I like them so much is they remind me of things I’ve learnt but sometimes need reminding of, we all need that right?

If life has drained your self love to an all time low, why not pop this simple quote on your bathroom mirror, or somewhere near the front door. Its a timely reminder that you are awesome, just the way you are. It may also help your self love to increase – people often think this is egotistical or selfish, but actually by putting yourself first (at times) means you’re often a better version of yourself for loved ones around you. So this week make sure you are no.1 and you’ve got your back, it might just be the making of you. 

37 thoughts on “I got my own back ”

  2. I love the sentiment of this post. If you don’t have your back no one else will rally. I agree that it will make you a stronger better person to those around you too. Your son sounds like he’s got it nailed already! MarvMondays

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  8. Brilliant sentiment. I completely agree that you can’t assume anything about a person simply by the size and make-up of their family. Your son sounds like he’s made of tough stuff and he’ll cope well out in the world if he can strug people’s dismissals like that. I wish I hadn’t taken that thing to heart as much as a child but it’s something I strive to do now. #MarvMondays

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  11. Oh yes that quote is gorgeous & would be perfect to read throughout the day. Your little man sounds really grounded & understanding. I’m glad he handled the situation so well. Thank you for joining me at #candidcuddles lovely I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reading your posts xx

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  12. I was an only child too and I agree with what you’re saying. It’s really good to have an actual phrase like that to remember when I’m feeling low on self-esteem. I’m going to remember this. Thanks so much for linking up to #EatSleepBlogRT. Zoe and I have decided that it’s not quite working the way we’d like at the moment, so we’re stepping back to reassess and there won’t be any linky for the foreseeable. But I love your blog so I’m sure I’ll still be keeping in touch. x

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  13. Self love is so important, but i must admit to being one of those who saw only children as spoilt, but thats only because all the ones I know were brats as kids and teens! How cute is your little one, such a lovely response and attitude!
    The more time goes on it seems Ben will be an only child and he is surprisingly chilled and happy to play with adults and share with children so we must be doing some right!
    Thank you for sharing this with us at #TriumphantTales, I hope to see you back tomorrow!

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  14. Excellent post, even with siblings I’ve always had my own back. I was a very independent little man. A lot of kids with siblings rely too much upon others and struggle when the net is taken away. I’d never thought of it this way before. Great read 👍

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  15. I really love how you were willing to step back and watch how your son coped with that situation, rather than wade in as so many would have done. Often, I think the internal monologue is so much more important than any external dialogue- we are all more resilient than we think. #thesatsesh

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  18. Great points. I have a sibling and now have 4 children. I know that I am not very resilient myself, but see in my children a need to have their own back. Maybe there is something in a large family that instills that too. Outside these doors they might always have someone to fight their corner, but inside its every man for himself 😉 #thesatsesh

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