Quote by the goddess Anon.
Apparently if females retain a friendship for over seven years, they tend to keep it for life. This fact seems to be relevant to my friendship group, in fact I’ve often lost contact or walked away from unhealthy friendships just before the seven year itch.
Jim Rohn has postulated that we are made up of the five people we socialise with the most…this worries me? Time wise I probably spend more time with work colleagues than my family and friends that I have chosen. Further research confirmed that if you are looking to climb the social ladder then just being with wealthy people can increase your income.
For any dieters out there, the same goes for weight, health and literally any social trend. Of course there are always exceptions but in the main my friends are all vaguely clones of me – similar occupations, Social status, finance, hobbies and even lifestyle choices like choosing not to smoke.
My vibe is much like my blog 75% positivity, 10% reality and the rest a combination of Disney vibes and sparkle, which means my tribe is similar (that’s a lot of sparkle)
If you are of a negative disposition or life has just taken you down a dark alley, be cautious about who’s hand you hold as you may be attracting a tribe member you wouldn’t usually aquaint yourself with, or that will keep you in the dark for longer than you need.
As far as tribes go, we are designed to thrive in small communities and not really meant to link with over 150 people in our life time. Our global identity and social media reality can mean most people can achieve this most days, so don’t be reluctant to take a step out of the crowds and reflect / invest time in your own vibes and those you prefer to spend time with. I think this is why I like to walk the dog and submerge myself in nature regularly.
How’s your tribe? Does it fulfill the vibe you desire and if not what action do you need to take.
Gosh I think I too am mostly influenced by work
Colleagues then. Or my kids. I have also backed away from people who have not been a positive influence, it has lead to
Me being described as emotionally hard by others. However I have several friends that I have know for 20 years or
More. These are the ones I love spending time with but as an EXPAT it is hard. Thanks for linking up to #EatSleepBlogRT
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I don’t think we need to worry about others, those that judge us won’t make it through 7weeks let alone a year.
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Oh this is such an interesting read! I read recently about the influences of the five closest people to you – so interesting – it makes sense though but does make you think about where your influences are coming from – I could easily apply this to my teens’ development and their peer group for sure! Sharing this post! #MarvMondays
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Teens are fascinating in chameleon behaviour with friends, may be we are just a little more subtle than them and so don’t realise it?
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This is so interesting. I am naturally quite a pessimistic person although I do try to be positive. My tribe is actually really positive which is perhaps why I have surrounded myself with them, to keep me a little more positive! #eatsleepblogRT
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Defo, smoother yourself in your loved ones, they probably balance you.
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Loved this. That 7 year rule is almost true for me. Although I fell out with a friend last year I’d had for 12 years which wasn’t nice but hey, that’s the way the cookie crumbles sometimes. #eatsleepblogrt
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Thanks. 7yrs is fascinating isn’t it? I wonder why it seems so true. Cookies crumble and biscuits break babe
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Love this… I did a post a wile bacon finding your Mama clan… i too think its super important and you post is really interesting… I have too lost friends or let go of friends just before the 7 year mark without even realising! I have different tribes for different things too! ❤ #EatSleepBlogRT
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Ohh I love different tribes for different needs. I don’t enjoy mixing friends do you?
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I sometimes do host birthday parties and such and invite everyone… but find people form cliques! ❤
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Yeah where there are people, there will be vibrational connections. I love the idea of parties though
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The 7 year friendship fact is very interesting – I’m quite stubborn about hanging on to some friendships that may not be the best anymore but some sense of loyalty or romaticised notion of the past has kept me pressing on. Then there are the amazing friendships that I have had for over 7 years that I couldn’t imagine being without even if we no longer speak every week anymore. I do need to make sure I speak to these important ‘tribe’ members more though. Thanks for provoking the reflection. xx #eatsleepblogRT
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No worries, true friendship doesn’t usually take much effort – that’s what makes it true. However, the peeps I’ve chosen to invest in give so much back (unlike banks).
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This is very interesting. I agree with the seven year rule – although sometimes getting out of those friendships politely is hard to do. I struggle with extricating myself from relationships I know are onesided as I’ve lived in 6 countries so far in my life – 5 before the age of 17, so my solution has always been geographic distance. Now I no longer want to keep moving I don’t know how to transition out of a friendship I find negative. I guess that will be what the next chapter of my life is about learning. I hope my vibe will keep getting more and more positive so as to attract the best possible tribe 🙂 #MarvMondays
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Jackie, it can only be what you want it to be. Plus how fun is learning and seeing yourself blossom…and in other news, so jealous of your travelling experience
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Oooo, I just did a post on this myself!
I agree with a lot of this, I’ve felt much happier becoming closer to a small group of ladies, rather than constantly trying to be everyones best friend. I feel like I’ve found my ‘tribe’.
Emily – BabiesandBeauty #marvmondays
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Stay there, love them and indulge them x they will return the love and indulgence twice over
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Quality not quantity. I’ve recently been shown the light in regards to recent friends and I’ve realised they can’t be real friends at all. Sad when you’ve gone through a lot of major milestones with them. However it’s made me value my true friends all the more. My tribe now is a loyal one. #marvmondays
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Defo…another reason i refuse to shop in Primark. I’m worth more and I don’t go to work to make do . Keep loving yourself wonderful lady. I love your writing style
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Thank you so much x
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No worries Hun x
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Love this and I think it really is true! If you have someone negative in your life then they really can drag you down. #Dreamteam
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Completely, like a fuzzy out of date battery
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You’re so right. I’ve been going through a low patch recently and so much of that has been influenced (not caused but definitely made worse) by the situations my friends are in. A close work friend is 6 months into a separation which is leading to divorce and that alone is taking a bit of a toll on me. She needs support but the last few weeks I can feel her dragging me down. I need to get some meet-ups with my other friends in. Great post! #MarvMondays
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That’s mrs W is fab advice you gave yourself, take sometime out
For you. You’ll be a better friend and they are too consumed in their own life at the moment. Wishing you all the best, with sparkle on top
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Very interesting. I’ve given the whole tribal thing some thought recently and find the whole idea of tribes fascinating. Did you see that documentary on tribes a couple of years ago? It focused on tribes around the world. It was so good. I agree – keep your tribe tight. Alison x #DreamTeam
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I LOVED this post!!! It’s so true! Being in a variety of tribes keeps me balanced and eyes open to the many things in this world. Some, I’m way more invested in. Others, just sitting on the surface looking in.
I love sparkle!! That’s the kind of tribe I love being in the most!!! Visiting from #EatSleepBlogRT!! So glad I did =) Please send Super Secret Sparkle handshake ASAP!!! I want in =)
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You are in (sparkle included), thanks my lovely and variety is the spice of life but not much chilli and you’ll get burnt 🙂
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This is true. I think my tribe is quite small and I think that how I’m most comfortable. I can to terms long ago that I wasn’t the sort of girl to have loads and loads of friends. I know my tribe and my tribe knows me.
#DreamTeam
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Best way Hun, a large tribe isn’t usually faithful
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I’ve never thought about it like that before!
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Hmm, I’m pretty sure I don’t have a tribe! I seem to flit from groups to groups depending on what I’m doing, but I guess I’ve spent the past 10 years really just working and my tribe was my colleagues – now I’m a SAHM to preschoolers I don’t have any tribe at all! I do hope it changes though – I’d love a tribe to be part of! #MarvMondays
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Ohhh in school I said you are a butterfly friend. You move around from flower (friend) to flower giving your best and taking the best nectar from them. It’s a really strong friendship strategy. I bet you have one or two besties?
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When I met my husband I was forced to reflect on my social group – they didn’t like him you see. At this point I did a lot of soul searching and decided that a few real friends were better than a lot if frenemies!! People come into your life for a reason, a season or a life time! Stopping by from #MarvMondays xx
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Love this, you clearly made the right decision Hun. Soul searching is fab for redirecting
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This was such an interesting post to read, especially as a mum and as a blogger. I find my social circles have changed somewhat since becoming both a parent and a blogger. I think I would definitely have to agree with the points you may, having reflected on them when reading this. Great post, thanks for sharing it on #MarvMondays. Emily
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No worries x keep loving your tribe
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I love this – in my real life, I have a small tribe of girls that I’ve known since I was 18…others seem to come in and out of my life to be honest so it’s interesting to read about the 7 year itch. I have to agree that when I meet people who are negative and bring you down a little, I don’t end up being close friends with them as my vibe just doesn’t match theirs. I love that yours is part Disney sparkle! Thanks for linking up to #dreamteam xx
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